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Old January 21st, 2012, 09:38 AM  
Professional Russian
VTs official redneck
 
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Name: Bert
Join Date: June 20, 2011
Location: Murrica, Fuck Yeah
Gender: Male
Default Re: Jokes and Riddles

This is my rifle ; this is my gun.
This is for fighting; this is for fun.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Short Circuit View Post

A pig's orgasm lasts 30 minutes. (O.M.G.!!!)

A cockroach will live nine days without its head before it starves to death. (Creepy. I'm still not over the pig.)

The male praying mantis cannot copulate while its head is attached to its body. The female initiates sex by ripping the male's head off. (Honey, I'm home . What the...?)

The flea can jump 350 times its body length. It's like a human jumping the length of a football field. (30 minutes. Lucky pig! Can you imagine?)

The catfish has over 27,000 taste buds. (What could be so tasty on the bottom of a pond?)

Some lions mate over 50 times a day. (I still can't believe that pig ...quality over quantity.)

Butterflies taste with their feet. (Something I always wanted to know.)

Elephants are the only animals that cannot jump. (Okay, so that would be a good thing.)

A cat's urine glows under a black light. (I wonder how much the government paid to figure that out.)

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain. (I know some people like that.)

Starfish have no brains. (I know some people like that, too.)

Polar bears are left-handed. (Talk about a southpaw.)

Humans and dolphins are the only species that have sex for pleasure. (What about that pig? Do the dolphins know about the pig?) Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread these crazy facts. (and God love that pig)......

Inappropriate image removed -Jon

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aotearoa View Post
What a fuckin miracle.

Last edited by Donkey; January 21st, 2012 at 10:13 AM.
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