You couldn't possibly understand
You couldn't possibly understand the way it feels when I fall asleep knowing she's asleep in your arms
You couldn't possibly understand the way it feels when you hear the words over and over again
you couldn't possibly understand the way it feels when you know you do something because you know you'll never be loved half as much as you love them.
You couldn't possibly understand the way it feels when I continually try and try to be happy and you always do something to bring me down
So I'm the reason that you're going to use this time. Because you didn't want me there. Yo should have just told me to leave. I wouldn't have left, but I would have known where I stand. I'm not going to blame this on you. But I will say you pushed me.
Push me a little farther. Maybe I can get the knife she gave me in my arm or leg or hip or stomach or neck a little deeper. Maybe I can bleed a little more to leave stains on my bedroom floor this time. I'm so sick of you. I try to be your friend and I abide by your wishes and I didn't kiss her. But whatever this time Lesley. Whatever. I know you read this and I know what you wrote before was about me.
So I was doing so well. No new scars. But then she pushed me. But it's not her fault. No never she can never do anything wrong. But this is what she does to me. I hate her. I hate that she can do this to me and the second I do the slightest thing it's all my fault and I'm the one to blame. It's not fair. This isn't fair either. i wanted to be done. I wanted to be better. But she won't let me get better. She won't. I'm dead where I stand. She's killing me. She wants me dead she gets her wish.
Now that we're done, I'm so sorry
Why did I lie, I'm so sorry
I know I hurt you
I know I hurt you