Thread: Is he confused?
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Old March 21st, 2007, 04:11 PM  
Dameon
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Join Date: February 5, 2007
Location: eternal abyss
Age: 27
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Default Re: Is he confused?

Yeah, glad I could be of help. I think a lot of people feel that way after their first time. And i think gay/bi guys have it worse because there is SOOO much anxiety involved.
I remeber when my mom picked me up...........the only thing I could think was what if she found out? Would she hate me? I felt DIRTY and I was certain that she could see it in my eyes. That was the first time I hated myself, TRULY. I sat in my bedroom thinking about how worthless I was, and how everybody would hate me when they found out. Worst of all I felt SOOOOO betrayed by him. I felt like he completely shattered my heart. The morning after ( we were at a band festival) he ignored me at the concert and on the ride home to where our parents were waiting fo us, he wouldn't hold my hand when I tried to (in the backseat,under the blanket). I felt like he hated me cause I couldn't be what he wanted me to be. I thought he still liked me, I thought I was in love with him.........but no. I was so worried about falling in love that I pursued "it" and I got what I deserved it.........................*sorry I lost my train of thought



(sorry for getting off topic....I think it might help to hear some of my experience cause it might help you see what's going on in his mind)
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