it sounds like your having a rough time. First things first, it sounds like there are some trust issues between you and your parents. Maybe if you tried really hard to gain their trust, things would start to get easier. At first, its going to seem like going the extra mile and doing things when not asked isn't getting you anywhere, but I'm pretty confident that one day you will say "hey, how did I manage to get to this point?!". Also, if your parents say something that really hits a sore spot, although it may be really really really hard, it may be best to just hold your tongue and agree, and eventually they will start to give you some lenience and stop riding your back.
I hope this helps!