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Old February 20th, 2007, 11:10 AM  
Divide By Hero
Underground_Network's Forum Picture
Name: Adam
Join Date: February 3, 2007
Location: Somewhere over a tainted rainbow.
Age: 24
Gender: Male
Blog Entries: 25
Default I Don't Know What To Do

I seriously think I'm losing my mind. I used to get really angry really easily and I have hurt people. I stabbed a kid with a knife, but it was only a skin cut once. I never get in trouble anymore, and I thought my anger issues were in the past, I thought I'd fixed everything. Nowadays its harder to piss me off, but when people do, I go to the extent of wanting to kill them. It also really sucks, cause I get migraines, and whenever I get one of those, I practically want to kill anyone who's near me. I want to die so bad, and I keep breaking down and crying over nothing. My friends know me as tough, intelligent, and mentally strong. I don't know what my friends and family could do without me. I also have dreams of murder, and I even wrote a story about "the perfect murder",l depicting me as the killer, and some people I really hate as the victims. I'm afraid if I don't get my emotions under control I'll hurt someone. I know that if i kill myself, I won't end up killing other people, but that might not be true. I wouldn't be surprised if my really close friend, or even my mom, who i'm really emotionally attached to, would harm themselves if i commit suicide. Nobody, except for my parents know that i've had thoughts of, and even attempted suicide. I don't like to hurt people, but sometimes I feel I just have to. I need help before I breakdown, and hurt someone. I wanna fix this problem before it occurs. HELP PLEASE!

I'm way too high (too high too high)
To be feeling this dry and low
I'm way too tired, I've tried
I'm fired up and ready to roll
Letís go
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