Re: Attention every man woman and child in entire planet
It's so great to see that kids still care about their utter annihilation at the hands of big business. I was beginning to think that everyone was too wrapped up in things like iPods and antique shopping to love the planet anymore.
As for the power rings, you can get one easily by going to your local pig farm and relieving some pigs of their excess blood. Then go out to a big open field and make a pentagram with the pig blood.
From there a representative will teleport to you and give you the contract for ring acquisition. If you have any legal questions he can teleport some lawyers over to help you out.