Hair dissolving creams/mousses etc can be used on your bikini line so you can use that to neaten the area, (make sure you follow the instructions VERY carefully). And you could just trim the rest of the hair.
Their are creams that you can use after you shave that are antiseptic, as well as ones that reduce the speed of hair regrowth. You could maybe ask at a pharmacy/drug store.
Your other option is waxing...not the most comfortable
, but you dont get the same rash you do with shaving and it lasts for weeks, so you dont have to re-do it every few days...
But its a personal choice. Dont let anyone make you feel bad for not shaving down there, its your body not theirs!