Re: am i crazy?
It is possible to be suicidal without being depressed and it is possible to be depressed but not suicidal. You are not going nuts. The sense that everything is surreal or pointless is not abnormal. You still need help though. Is there anyone who has been helping you? Their support will still be valuable.
~ The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step ~
* Nothing in the world has ever been accomplished without passion *