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Old March 22nd, 2011, 04:37 PM   #1
Spook
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Name: Caitlin
Join Date: March 22, 2011
Location: Climbin' in yo windows, snatchin' yo people up
Age: 20
Gender: Female
Blog Entries: 1
Default OCD and New Member

Hi, VT! I am new and want to introduce myself. Well my name is Caitlin, I am 13, and my birthday just passed! I want to talk a little bit about a problem I had, and have (a little). It is called OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder). Here is my story with OCD: I was sitting in my living room watching TV and a Purell commercial came on. It showed a boy touching the door of a car, and germs crawling up his arms. This scared me, as I was very young, and I began to wash my hands alot. I constantly washed them, after every little thing I did. Before long my hands got dry, and in the winter they cracked and bled. My mom tried to make me wear lotion but I wiped it off because it felt sticky and gross. My OCD got worse. I would wear myself out trying to straighten everything. It got so bad I even started cleaning my sibling's rooms! Anything out of place got me to work, (just now I straightened the tissue box). My OCD got worse. I began to hear voices, one which said "I hate God." This scared me because I am very religious and I felt like I was sinning. After this, my OCD still got worse. The voices told me to do something, and if I didn't something bad would happen. So I would do things like say random words aloud, run across the room, pick up an object, or even do dangerous things. This started to become a problem, so, I went to a therapist. She made me do excersizes like rolling my hands in dirt so I could improve. This didn't work. What did work however (in a different therapist) was keeping a journal about the "OCD monster." I drew a picture on the cover of the journal, and I would keep a log of when I washed my hands, and thing that the "monster" told me to do. Well, I have been really successful in my battle. i no longer wash my hands excessively, I only occassionally hear voices (and have started to resist the urge to listen), and I clean and organize much less. I am really proud of myself, and so are my parents and siblings. I used to feal like a mental freak, afraid of what people would think. Kids would make fun of how my hands looked ugly and dry, and I felt bad. But now I don't get those comments, and i don't feel like a freak. I just recently got taken off my medicine, and I am doing fine. People say that you have to live with a mental illness, but I am proof that you don't. i hope to fully lose my triggers and urges within the next few years. Wish me luck, and I am so happy to have joined VT. TTYL!

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