There is only one possible answer left.. You must be an alien.. From.. Dare I say it- Uranus!
Seriously though, you don't need to have a wet dream. I can't really recall having any.. One time when I was 12 I woke up sweaty, but I wasn't horny or anything at all.
All my friends are skeletons,
dulcimers and chariots
prayers to God, oh prayers to God
Was I sleeping all this time?
Was my shadow ever mine?Wintersleep-Danse Macabre