Dont know what to do
My best friend, well, she used to be my best friend, has turned into one of those stupid conceited highschool girls. We started highschool about 9 weeks back and, all of a sudden she thinks she is the coolest thing since sliced bread.
She was the sweetest person when we were in middle school, but I dont know who she is anymore. It seems like all my best friends end up going away. My best friend Megan, god I miss her, she left my middle school before eighth grade and I saw her maybe a few times after that. Her mother hated me, I guess she thought I was a bad influence. I know it's mostly because the last time I was at her house, I had just broken up with my one and only boyfriend and I was so serious about commiting suicide, so Megan told her parents. Her mom was never really nice, I was always afraid of her. But anyway she wouldnt let me see Megan anymore. You cant just take away the best friend of a suicidal girl,...you just cant do that. And now, Im losing my other best friend. I dont know what to do. And I dont want to do this, I really dont...but Im going to cut again. I hate highschool, I hate Sarah for doing this, and I hate my life. I dont even know why I stay alive anymore...everything and everyone I love just seems to go away. Everyone hates me, Ive got maybe a handful of friends. I dont really blame everyone, Im not nice, and Im not friendly...but I cant help it, it's the way I am. I just dont want to do this anymore...I cant do this anymore.
I DO NOT GO ON HERE ANYMORE. I HAVE LEFT THIS PLACE FOR GOOD AND DON'T INTEND ON COMING BACK. PLEASE DON'T FRIEND REQUEST ME, PRIVATE MESSAGE ME, OR ANYTHING BECAUSE I WILL NEVER SEE IT AND YOU'LL NEVER GET A RESPONSE. THANK YOU.