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Old October 6th, 2006, 06:52 PM  
Jean Poutine
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Name: Tony
Join Date: September 27, 2006
Location: Canada
Age: 27
Gender: Male
Blog Entries: 8
Default Re: A blatant lack of friends and some more stuff...

Originally Posted by TheWizard View Post
First I'm so glad to meet you. I know exactly how you feel cause I'm schizo too. VT is the perfect place to make new friends. It hides your problems from people so they have to accept you the way you want them to see you. Perfect place for you to pratice making friends.

I started VT to help other mentals like you and me. But I found out I can make friends with normal people too.

It like this. If you keep doing the samethings you are doing today, you can only expect to get the same resuilts in the future. So you have to change. I changed a lot while on VT as I learned how to make new friends.

It helped me in the real world (actually I live in my own world of reality which is near normal).

What meds do you take? I take geodon and serquel. Works great for me. Ability is another good schizo med.

I hope we can become good friends.
I do not take any meds. I wasn't interested in treatement when I was diagnosed (and my parents couldn't force me because I was legally old enough to refuse treatement), because I did not think there was anything wrong with my behaviour. However, now that I realise I'm obviously apart from the norm, I don't will depend on how I fix this.

Originally Posted by **Adrian** View Post
ok so, you dont like being around people, but suddenly you do ... but you dont

which one do you prefer more, alone or not alone?

and um...dont kill yourself, thats never a good solution =\ you'll suffer more if you do =/ anyway! answer my question and ill get back to you =O

and i sort of agree, seeing a psy isn't exactly the best solution, not always anyway, not a good suggestion anyway, one would just figure that out i try to help in other ways =\ yeah so answer the question

"which one do you prefer more, alone or not alone? "
First, I am not very suicidal. I realise that it is an one-time only gesture and that I can't come back when the deed is done, which is what is stopping me from doing it. I have urges, but they are easily controlled.

I do not really like being with people because I have the impression I'm choking when they are around. The only thing I do is to push them back. When I'm alone, I feel great for a while, but when I am not occupied, I start wondering what it might be like to be slightly more normal, then I begin feeling depressed and down.

I do not draw much fun from "social activities" such as teamwork, sports, and so on. I am at my happiest when I'm alone, reading a book by the fire, browsing the Web ('specially Wiki) or playing video games. I also talk with my mom once in a while, although not more than 3-4 times a day or something like that.

I cannot really answer your question, because I never had true friends. Acquaintances at most, and even then, it's a long drag. I have no true friends from my POV. People I reply (note the word) "hi" to in hallways do not count as friends.

My lack of social experiences seem to keep me from relating to other people. I cannot see why they have so much fun in groups, because whenever I'm in one (like for teamwork, teacher-enforced stuff and so on), I draw no fun whatsover of the experience. Especially teamwork : I hate how everyone is talking while I'm stuck doing all the work. If they do work, they usually do not hold up to my seemingly ridiculous standards, and I've gone as far as re-doing their parts to my liking because I thought they weren't good.

In absolute terms, I'd probably say I prefer being alone, but this state leads me to increased depression, and I don't know if being with people would fix it at all. However, in relative terms, I cannot give you an answer, because I don't know how having friends is like.

I doubt I'll ever be able to make friends, anyway. I'm too different from them and they're not like me. The world and I cannot relate, and this is why I'll always prefer my artificial, constructed realms (down to the language and economic status) to the real world.
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