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Old September 27th, 2006, 06:09 PM  
kolte
I am: I am
 
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Name: Matt
Join Date: May 31, 2005
Location: usa
Age: 27
Gender: Male
Default im buggin...im trippen

we need a general discussions for mental illness becaue im not haveng a mental crisis. but i am going insane. ive noticed, more and more, and so have others. I cant communicate anymore, I'm so incoherent all the time, nobody knows what Im trying to tell them anymore. people are justl ike, what the fuck are you talking about???? and i really dont know. im finding that im my own best friend reall, I can confide in myself, and other people are fools. all of them. they talk without consideration and they insult people without provication. ive taken to keeping my mouth shut, and speaking only when spoken to. i was contemplating suicide the other day, not because of depression, but becasue of anxiety. and guilt. unfounded guilt. no reason. i cant ride the bus, im to scared. i cant talk to people i once considered friends, too scared. im afried to eat alone, but driven crazy thinking about eating with other people.

i wonder.

am i inheriting schizoprenia. am i doomed to never achive all the things i so wanted to? political sucess? now simply a fools dream? Animation and sound acting, so close to my fingertips....yet so far away.

I hate me and I hate you.



""The New Law of Righteousness," that there "shall be no buying or selling, no fairs nor markets, but the whole earth shall be a common treasury for every man," and "there shall be none Lord over others, but every one shall be a Lord of himself.""
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