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-   -   This thing I call my life (http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/showthread.php?t=2022496)

Just JT November 12th, 2015 02:15 PM

This thing I call my life
 
Hey, my names JT. I've been here a few months, and made a bunch of really cool friends here, done a bunch of posts. Not as much as others, but still a fair amount, after all, it's really not about posts is it?

I've shared a bunch about my life here, but it's come out in bits and pieces in some surveys, and other discussion threads and a lot in pm's in talking to people. I sometimes get pm's about some posts I've made, and it's pretty clear I guess that the people who ask those certain questions don't know a lot about my life or my past. Even though I have a diary thread, and many people have come through those doors at all hours of the day and night, I wasn't able to really wholly share my past, and allow for open conversation for people who want to ask about it. Does not mean I did not like or want people to visit the bar, I do, it's a fun place. I'm just at a different point in life where I want to share more about myself than I have in a normal, progressive time line kind of diary.

So I'll start here, and I'll add a little everyday or so as I feel inspired. And your welcome to ask me stuff or what ever ok?

So here I go.....for as far back as I can remember, my mom and dad always caught, they were both heavy drug and alcohol abusers. I actually don't think my mom ever liked or wanted me. The only memories I have of her are of her abusing me. She was a cunt and that's the only way I can out it. She was not nice in any way shape or form. My dad was the one who took care of me, feed me bathed me, did everything for me, he was great.

Well one day, all that changed when mom and dad broke up and dad left me behind with the wicked witch of the north east to fend for myself, then she had free rhaines to do as she pleased, but never enough to raise any suspicion on my dads part, not that he was real observant. But I did love his attention on my visits every other weekend and every school holiday and vacation. See, school was a baby sitter so mom could get high or drunk, so if there was no school, she'd have to watch me. I simy didn't fit into her life style at all, and she had a personal agenda to make sure as shit I was cramping her
Style.

So meet mom, more on another time...

Just JT November 15th, 2015 02:49 PM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
The nice thing my mom did then, was to take into consideration that as my dad did travel a lot for his "work" and wouldn't be around much, that I obviously needed a positive me role model around on a consistant basis. I could never understand why thi was so important to mom, and hopefully never will. So her brother, uncle Joe, moved in. I loved uncle joe, really, he was awsome, always nice, did stuff with me, took me places, took care of me, and best thing, put himself between and me and mom. Thanks god!!

I was young, like 5, he was like my mom, dad, big brother and best friend all rolled into one bigger adult, an adult who could understand me, my needs, and take care of me, nurse my wounds from mom..... When it was meal time, he was there, chores, he helped, clean my room, helped and told me to do it. Set up at times with friends, everything. Even baths, and bedtime, help with baths and read my bedtime stories at night. I remember, one time, I was taking a bath, my penis got hard, and I asked him why? I didn't know about sex at that age, but he did. He explained mostly how most adults probably would. Well it for going pee, and making babies and having sex. And that was all he said, but I was curious about the sex part, so he tried me some, and how it feels good, and that boys can make it feel good to. I asked how, and he offered to show me how. Well hell yeah, I stood up and said then show me, and so he did. With his hand, he masturbated me to full climax right there dripping bubble bath down my back until I couldn't stand anymore and fell into him, and he simply held me dried me off and started to put my pjs on as if nothing had happened. And all I kept thinking to myself was wow, wtf just happened, I really liked this, and I wanted to know more. I might of been 6 or 7 at the time.

Think I mentioned in the first post your free to post here if you choose, it's up to you....
But since it is a diary thread, even if you don't post, maybe just say you were here, and sign in or something, a old time or place is cool. Just like to know who's is reading, and keeping in touch
Thanks for reading

Jaffe November 15th, 2015 03:55 PM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
Proud of you, friend. And yes, be assured that although I won't post much in this thread, I am definitely reading it, all of it.

Just JT November 15th, 2015 04:13 PM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
Thanks, won't knowing someone, or who, is all that matters...

kyrie tony November 15th, 2015 04:39 PM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
Friend am really following every inch of the whole thin

Abyssal Echo November 15th, 2015 09:00 PM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
I've been through a lot of shit too so I know it takes a lot to talk about it.
I doubt I'll post much if at all but like @Jaffe I'll be reading it.

jockeyboy97 November 16th, 2015 12:39 AM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
TJ, you have experienced a lot of things at a young age you should have never experienced. I have read many of your posts that had excerpts of your past childhood. I have to say that I admire you a lot for being strong and how you seem to have overcomed so much. Your a special guy and deserve to be adopted by that wonderful family that want to make you their son. If anyone deserves it is you. You will finally get all the love and attention you deserve, and have a family for life.

Just JT November 21st, 2015 09:57 AM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by jockeyboy97 (Post 3259269)
TJ, you have experienced a lot of things at a young age you should have never experienced. I have read many of your posts that had excerpts of your past childhood. I have to say that I admire you a lot for being strong and how you seem to have overcomed so much. Your a special guy and deserve to be adopted by that wonderful family that want to make you their son. If anyone deserves it is you. You will finally get all the love and attention you deserve, and have a family for life.


Thanks, I appreciate your kind words, but right now, I'm having mixed feelings of continuing this thread/ diary, and continuing innVT all together tbh

I've simply come to a point in my life I need to make choices about things and those decisions are based on a number of factors. And unfortunatly, all the cards seem to point to VT to not be a part of my life any more...

Just JT May 24th, 2016 06:59 AM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
I've been away a few months, actually forgot about this thread. I guess I could pick up where I left off, or at least post something. Not sure I want to go back in time and relive any more of that hell but right now I'll say what's new for me.

Well, I applied to a new high school for me to go to. It's not a private school, it's a public school, it's a trade tech school. It's actually a pretty hard school to get into. Obviously an application, had to write an essay on why I should be accepted and what I had to offer the school as a student, and an interview to. I did very well on all 3 and was accepted!! :yay:
I was so pumped, I was really nervous because I don't have a very good school record, and the school is known for declining apps if the students have any sort of discipline issues or behavior issues in their record. So lucky for me they only looked at this current school year. Because I've had no school related behavioral issues all year, and that's a huge accomplishment for me, I really proud of that. And I'm really looking forward to school next year

So the school, it offers like 20 different shops. I choose 1, and go through the 4 year program and graduate with a highschool diploma, and I'll be ready for work in that field. I'm thinking of carpentry. But I need to go through the "discovery program" which is most of the freshman program. I'll need to spend some time in each shop, like 1 week, and when I'm done, I'll be allowed to choose my shop, and first choice goes by your gpa, so grades are important.

I'm really looking forward to this school year, it's not all sitting at a desk, it's a week of classes, and a week of shop, and free sports to!!

Just JT May 25th, 2016 01:27 PM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
Some other good news, for those that remember, I'm being adopted by my foster parents. As a family, I've lived with them for almost 1 year now, this coming weekend. I was placed there as a foster child, and things really worked out really great for us over all. We've had our ups and downs along the way. Been arrested a couple times, run away once, been in some fights, and a few other things he I've done to destro their personal property. But for some reason, they don't turn their back to me like so many people in my life have. It's been like the more things I do, the more they've up loving me or something. Even when I know it's painful for them.
But I think I've grown in the last year and have come to terms with some of my past, more than I thought I'd be able to, so I'm not such a pissed off person as I used to be. And I look at myself as being very lucky to have them, and all my friends I've made in this past year. And that's wasn't easy either.

Yeah, so the adoption is finalized next month, I wana say June 10th or 13. It's either that Friday or Monday I'm not sure

So wish me luck if your reading this, that way I know someone read it and I'm not just writing this for me, which I really am anyways lol!!

Dalcourt May 25th, 2016 02:26 PM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
I'm so happy to hear that it all worked out so well with your new family and the adoption is finalised soon.
I dunno about adoption stuff myself as I was way too young but my Dad told me that it was a shitload full of paperwork having me.

Just JT May 25th, 2016 09:08 PM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by corbeau (Post 3369421)
I'm so happy to hear that it all worked out so well with your new family and the adoption is finalised soon.
I dunno about adoption stuff myself as I was way too young but my Dad told me that it was a shitload full of paperwork having me.


Thanks man, yeah, it kinda has been a long time coming hasn't it?
It is a shit ton of paperwork, meetings, screenings, approvals, interviews, a shitonnof crap as far as I'm concerned atm.
Im just glad it's guna be over soon, and I'll have a place to really call ho,e with my mom and dad.

I didn't know you were adopted bro.....did you ever tell me that?

FuTo May 25th, 2016 09:15 PM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
<----speechless

Just JT May 25th, 2016 09:16 PM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by FuTo (Post 3369562)
<----speechless

Why?

FuTo May 25th, 2016 09:18 PM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by TJreversed (Post 3369563)
Why?

Its a good thread :D

Just JT May 25th, 2016 09:20 PM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by FuTo (Post 3369564)
Its a good thread :D


Well maybe, it's not very long, I'd like a place to kinda share me with some friends or people who actually give a shit.
So if your interested then stop by once in a while

FuTo May 25th, 2016 09:26 PM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by TJreversed (Post 3369567)
Well maybe, it's not very long, I'd like a place to kinda share me with some friends or people who actually give a shit.
So if your interested then stop by once in a while

Oh I will haha I like stories and talking to people. Hope to get to know you! :D

jockeyboy97 May 26th, 2016 01:21 AM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by TJreversed (Post 3369391)
Some other good news, for those that remember, I'm being adopted by my foster parents. As a family, I've lived with them for almost 1 year now, this coming weekend. I was placed there as a foster child, and things really worked out really great for us over all. We've had our ups and downs along the way. Been arrested a couple times, run away once, been in some fights, and a few other things he I've done to destro their personal property. But for some reason, they don't turn their back to me like so many people in my life have. It's been like the more things I do, the more they've up loving me or something. Even when I know it's painful for them.
But I think I've grown in the last year and have come to terms with some of my past, more than I thought I'd be able to, so I'm not such a pissed off person as I used to be. And I look at myself as being very lucky to have them, and all my friends I've made in this past year. And that's wasn't easy either.

Yeah, so the adoption is finalized next month, I wana say June 10th or 13. It's either that Friday or Monday I'm not sure

So wish me luck if your reading this, that way I know someone read it and I'm not just writing this for me, which I really am anyways lol!!

Congratulations on your adoption! You deserve it and I remember you old posts from before. Good Luck!!!:yeah:

Just JT May 26th, 2016 04:31 AM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
Hey @jockeyboy97 good to see you again!!
I sent a couple pm's to you over the last few months, didnr hear from ya and I assumed you kinda dropped off bro
Glad you stoped by, and thanks, yeah is all coming to a rapid close soon.
We're all pretty excited about it

It's not like I ever didn't know I could stay here forever, I know they love me. I could feel that the first time we meet. I just can't believe it's actually happening tbh!

My own family again, a real family, a normal family lol!!
A family forever, mom and dad....

Just JT May 27th, 2016 05:02 AM

Re: This thing I call my life
 
So today is Memorial Day weekend. One year ago today I was woken up a little early, packed up the few things I had and was moved into the foster home I live in now. It's been a whole year already. Memorial Day weekend.

I remember saying things to myself like wtf, we only meet once, what if it don't work, what if I can't stand them or whatbever.

Then I got my own room, alone, on the entire floor of the house alone.
I learned new rules I kicked and bucked almost imediatly, defied the felines placed in me, doing what ever I could to sabatofe all the work to obtain this placement.

They bought me clothes, a computer, a bike, showerd me with love. And all I gave in return was my anger, hatred, and destruction of not only their hard work to help make my life better but also their belongings, their home, their cars.....

But they never stopped loving me.....I look back and wonder why it took so long for me to realize their love


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