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Alexander89 October 3rd, 2007 07:17 PM

I got some pestering problems
Hi ive been a suffer since i was bout 9, i dont really have things like counting letters, or stepping on cracks, but more so unwanted thoughts, altho i do hoard unwanted items and i belive thats a symptom too.

But its like this,
I work at a child care, i am religous and i love my family very much, and it seems like i get disturbing thoughts about everything im in conjunction with, i might think a bad thought about a child or i want to harm my family and blasmhous (spelling?) thoughts about god! Now i know in my heart im not that kind of person but i have learned to live with the thoughts and they have become less pestering, but another problem arise,

Im not sure if this is OCD but i would like to know what it is,

Some times i feel bad for things i did when i was a kid, im 18 now btw.
Now atm i keep feeling guilty because of this.

When i was about 12 or 13 i was just playing around with a brothers friend on the beds, now there was nothing to it, just kids being kids, like my thing accidently touched hers ( we had clothes on of course), it was just like if someone accidently brushed agaisnt ya, and as soon as that happened, i had a thought about sex, something i didnt want to think because she was only like 7, (even if i did mean it, i was only 12 and it shouldnd bother me ) now im sure it was a ocd thought because as soon as it happened i hoped down because it disturb me, now i keep thinking, was i up there for a reason?, and i keep replaying the even over and over in my head to prove myself i did nothing wrong, i know in my heart i did nothing wrong but my brain says other wises, so is that part of OCD too? making a real life event annoy u?

RaisingSand October 4th, 2007 02:42 AM

Re: I got some pestering problems
Wow. I don't think anyone, even less so me, could say if that's OCD or not, as there's only so much you can find out etc over an online help forum, but it sounds like you really need to maybe consider going to see a counsellor, who could maybe refer you to a pyschologist if they think the traits etc for OCD are definitely there.
Btw, when you're a young kid, or around the age you said you were when you were having those sexual thoughts ... it is normal to have thoughts like that around that age, it's natural human curiosity.

Sapphire October 4th, 2007 09:43 AM

Re: I got some pestering problems
As Angie has said, we can't say for definite whether you have OCD.
My personal opinion is that you are very self punishing and have obsessive thoughts because of this. Your physical reaction when you were younger is a natural one for someone of that age and not one which you should feel so guilty about.
I often get wound up about things which happen or happened a while ago too. It is not particularly healthy, but I wouldn't put it down to OCD at all.

Btw, were you diagnosed at the age of 9? If so, what help did you receive?

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