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-   -   This boy (http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/showthread.php?t=2039721)

wolfbuddy August 28th, 2017 02:16 PM

This boy
 
So I have a crush on this boy who I met in my school and in my neighborhood. He's really cute, smart and nice to me and I had a crush on him the moment I looked on him. I want to ask him out, but I'm afraid he will turn me down or come out to be straight.

I just can't get him out of my mind now. He's stuck on my brain and I want him for myself now.

My only problem is that he's 17 and I'm 13, and I don't know if he's gay or not. My best friend told me that he's gay and single, but I am not sure if I should trust him.

Every time I talk with him, he smiles at me and answers softly. Sometimes he tousles my hair and called me 'cute' and 'adorable'. I don't know if he means that in the gay sense or if he's treating me like a little brother. I'm confused.

mick01 August 28th, 2017 02:38 PM

Re: This boy
 
First, that seems to be a pretty big age difference. Even if he is gay, I'd be surprised if he would date someone 4 years younger.
But I guess its worth a try. Why don't you just admit to him that you're gay and see what reaction you get? That could get the conversation going. If you find out he's gay, ask him if he would ever consider going out with you.

JohnC August 28th, 2017 02:49 PM

Re: This boy
 
I would be worried about the age difference too man. That could even be a legal matter for your older friend. If your parents got upset that you were seeing each other and doing stuff together they could report him. I have heard of that happening to older boys dating younger girls. I don't know about your parent's opinions. Be careful

Vermilion August 28th, 2017 03:23 PM

Re: This boy
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by wolfbuddy (Post 3565557)
So I have a crush on this boy who I met in my school and in my neighborhood. He's really cute, smart and nice to me and I had a crush on him the moment I looked on him. I want to ask him out, but I'm afraid he will turn me down or come out to be straight.

I just can't get him out of my mind now. He's stuck on my brain and I want him for myself now.

My only problem is that he's 17 and I'm 13, and I don't know if he's gay or not. My best friend told me that he's gay and single, but I am not sure if I should trust him.

Every time I talk with him, he smiles at me and answers softly. Sometimes he tousles my hair and called me 'cute' and 'adorable'. I don't know if he means that in the gay sense or if he's treating me like a little brother. I'm confused.

Maybe just ask him if he's gay or bi or straight in a chat. Yes the age gap is a bit much and would make things awkward but doesn't mean you can't be with each other.

jamie_n5 August 28th, 2017 04:07 PM

Re: This boy
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by mick01 (Post 3565563)
First, that seems to be a pretty big age difference. Even if he is gay, I'd be surprised if he would date someone 4 years younger.
But I guess its worth a try. Why don't you just admit to him that you're gay and see what reaction you get? That could get the conversation going. If you find out he's gay, ask him if he would ever consider going out with you.

I agree with @mick01 that the age difference might a bit of a problem. I think however since you are so infatuated with him you should go ahead and ask him if he would go out with you or experiment with you. You have nothing to really loose by trying. Good Luck.

mick01 August 28th, 2017 05:06 PM

Re: This boy
 
Jonathan, I saw just now where you said you haven't started puberty. I'm not throwing any shade your way but that probably means you don't have pubes yet, can't cum and I guess some other things. I don't think its a good idea, at all, to try to be with a 17 year who's getting near the end of puberty when you haven't even started. Start out with someone who is nearer your age and going through the same stuff.

kyrocks03 August 28th, 2017 06:05 PM

Re: This boy
 
I think the age difference is too much especially given the fact that you are 13. I had a boyfriend when I was 13 also (still with him today) but he's the same age as me going through the same body changes. The biggest concern would be that he could get into significant trouble.

ska8er August 28th, 2017 06:15 PM

Re: This boy
 
A lot of guys just starting puberty
sometimes get crushes on older guys.
I think what u r going through is just a
crush. I agree with many above that he
is a little bit too mature for u. It would b
safer if u found someone who is ur age an
just starting puberty to bond with. Just b
careful no matter what u do.

SethfromMI August 28th, 2017 06:54 PM

Re: This boy
 
I understand why you have the crush but there is too big of an age difference. the older you get it may not matter as much but right now, he could end up registered as a sex offender if he tried anything with you. I am sorry but try to find someone closer to your age.

kro814 August 28th, 2017 08:52 PM

Re: This boy
 
Why not find a boy closer in age?

wolfbuddy August 29th, 2017 02:23 AM

Re: This boy
 
Well, I can't just control with whom I fall in love. And besides, he treats me better than all other friends do, I get a sense of protection around him and want him at least around me if not inside me.

He's really nice and caring, gives me hugs when I have a tough day, helps me do my homework and kisses me on my forehead. I tried to tell him that I'm gay but I couldn't get the courage to confess to him.

I don't think there will be a problem if no one finds out, half the time his parents are not there.

chomoto123 August 29th, 2017 02:49 PM

Re: This boy
 
Maybe the feeling is mutual
You should find a time you're alone with him
Or when u feel safe
And try asking him or drop hints ??
If you don't feel safe or secure, do not proceed yet
Wait for the right moment :D

wolfbuddy August 30th, 2017 03:05 PM

Re: This boy
 
Um, okay...


So, I just talked with him and told him that I'm gay but he says that he already knew. I asked his opinions and on how he feels and he told me that he hopes I'll find a boyfriend soon who will love me and care for me.


He didn't tell me if he was gay or not, but I think he is because he shows me a lot of love. I told him that I had a tough day and he hugged me and kissed me on my forehead, he later invited me tonight for dinner at his home.


I've been dropping a lot of hints lately by touching his body and leaning on him, and every time I do he just holds my hand or wraps his hand around me. I don't know if he's going to take me as his. He however, seems to be very friendly around me, actually the friendliest anyone has ever been to me.

NewLeafsFan August 30th, 2017 10:26 PM

Re: This boy
 
I'm very confused. He clearly has some sort of feelings for you. They might be little bro feelings or more than that. I just want to point out the age difference. I know its only a few years but that could turn a relationship into a statutory rape charge. Figure out what the laws are where you live.

wolfbuddy September 1st, 2017 02:52 PM

Re: This boy
 
So I've been hanging out with him a lot lately. I told him that I don't have many friends or someone who can love me very much, and he said that he "loves me" and I can call him anytime I feel lonely and count on him any time I need help. I don't know if he said that in the gay sense or if he thinks of me as a little brother. My mom says he's a very nice young man and trusts me with him.

Will it count as statutory rape if I give my full consent and also let no one know?

pjones September 1st, 2017 06:21 PM

Re: This boy
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by wolfbuddy (Post 3567379)
So I've been hanging out with him a lot lately. I told him that I don't have many friends or someone who can love me very much, and he said that he "loves me" and I can call him anytime I feel lonely and count on him any time I need help. I don't know if he said that in the gay sense or if he thinks of me as a little brother. My mom says he's a very nice young man and trusts me with him.

Will it count as statutory rape if I give my full consent and also let no one know?

If he hasn't shared his sexuality with you it's most likely for a reason. My guess is you are a friend rather than a possible sexual partner to him. My advice is to enjoy his friendship. While you may give your consent, where you live that may not be enough to avoid any potential legal problems, which would affect him for life much more than they would you. I hope it all works out for you

Skylake78 September 1st, 2017 06:43 PM

Re: This boy
 
Quote:

Originally Posted by wolfbuddy (Post 3567379)
So I've been hanging out with him a lot lately. I told him that I don't have many friends or someone who can love me very much, and he said that he "loves me" and I can call him anytime I feel lonely and count on him any time I need help. I don't know if he said that in the gay sense or if he thinks of me as a little brother. My mom says he's a very nice young man and trusts me with him.

Will it count as statutory rape if I give my full consent and also let no one know?

What I'd say is before allowing things to proceed any further, make sure you do a lot of research on the local state laws as well as national. I know doing research on laws isn't the most enjoyable thing in the world, but just remember that if anything goes wrong then it's going to be him that'll get pretty much the full blunt of any legal actions that are carried out as a result if anyone were to find out, since he's the much older one. I'm not saying "don't love him" because we can't help who we fall in love with, but I want to make sure you realize the negative consequences for him that could result from a relationship with you. Sorry I don't have a straight answer to your question, but I'm not familiar with the laws in your area and I don't want to give you misleading information :whoops:

Edit: I have to agree with pjones above, about how if he hasn't shared his sexuality than it's probably for a reason. If you want to be extra safe, which you definitely want to be anyways with this sort of situation, is keep things like they are now, and don't move things faster than they need to.

kro814 September 1st, 2017 09:09 PM

Re: This boy
 
You are in Tennessee. The age of consent is 18 -see exception:


Tennessee statutory rape law is violated when a person has consensual sexual intercourse with an individual under age 18. A close in age exemption allows teens ages 13-18 to consent to partners less than 4 years older. Punishments differ depending on the ages of victim and offender.

Just JT September 1st, 2017 09:10 PM

Re: This boy
 
There's a lot happening here. Your 13 and he's 17
There's the obvious legal shit depending on where you live, be aware of that. If you care about him as much as you say here then don't put him in that position. Regardless of how you feel. It's just not fair to either one of you.

About what happening between you, cool, you were honest. And seeems so was he. But be careful. He may be approaching with caution as well

But he could also just be showing you some brotherly affection. But I doubt it.

Tbh, I'm 17 now. And I'd love to get with a younger dude. But that's just not cool. He can't do that and you shouldn't put him there either.

Check your laws and wait till it's cool to do so. If you really love him and he does you....you'll both wait and it'll be sooooo worth it

kirikiri94 September 2nd, 2017 06:51 AM

Re: This boy
 
It's all good !


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