View Full Version : Where do I go from here?

February 12th, 2009, 11:47 AM
I love this guy(Ruben) alot he means the world to me. I've had a crush on him since 5th grade. i remember the say I met him, it was at dance practice. He sat there watching the girls practice, I was the oldest out of all the girls. I would try to look at him the whole night everytime he would look at me i would be so embarrased to make eye contact with him. His sister and I became bestfriends and were she was he was there too. It was amazing i loved bein even a few feet away from him. In 2007 some where in december he came to Mariachi practice with his sister, Me and Gabrielle both played the trumpet. He was being forced to be in the band because of his grades. He was forced to play the Violin. I started noticing that he staried coming around me more he started sitting closer to me,I would get so excited that he started to talk to me. This past summer I got a text sayin hi, i didnt kno who this was so i text back asking who it was..... It was him.Thoughts were racing through my mind I was so scared i didnt know what to do. Well we started talkin to each other. He turned out to be just like me, other than the guy(Nick) I was dating at the time. he was really sweet alot nicer than Nick. Nick was more of a gangster he was alot bigger than me, we would get into fights all the time. I was getting tired of it. Whenever I would talk to Ruben Nick would get mad, I guess you could say he was getting jelous.Ruben was getting tired of me talking about how upset I was getting over Nick. Ruben said I should leave him. That if me and Nick were meant to be that I could addmit that I loved him. I couldn't addmit it. Me and Nick started drifting apart from each other, Ruben was coming closer. Finally, the words I have been waiting for... He asked me!:wub: I told him idk(even though i was gonna say yes) because I was still with Nick. He told me he would wait for me no matter how long, he would wait for me. It was the Best day ever but I was still with Nick. I didnt know how to do it After five days of thinking it happened. I broke up with Nick. It hurt but it was for good never again will I go back for Nick.The next day I told Ruben he was happy, he was proud of me. I felt human again, i felt wanted. The day was August 2,2008 and now its February 7,2009 It has been six months. We have done alot of things together. Whats weird is we love going to church together. We dance alot, not to that gross rap music but to Country and Tejano. Our first dance was Neon Moon. We love being together as a couple. Well I just recently got grounded because Ruben picked me up after tennis practice and my mom got mad. Well my phone was takin away and I have no contact with him. His mother thought we broke up,we didnt. All of a sudden his mom started calling my mom. They started talking about me and Ruben. Well his mom wants us to break up. His mom is keeping us away from each other. I dont know what to do I dont wanna break up with him. I love him alot, I dont wanna leave him. He's my everything. I'm not gonna break up with him. But i need some advice on what to do.:confused:
EDIT: (3/2/09)
Well we broke up, he told me that he was too busy with baseball. I doubt that because he would make time for and do anything to be with me. I think his mom finally convinced him to break up with me. The thing is now, he tells me he still loves me and cares for me the same way he did when we were together. We are still Best friends, and we still both care for each other. He is still jealous of people trying to mess with me, it pisses him off. Well Wednsday he got his phone taken up(I didnt know) I kept trying to text him, I started feeling bad because he wouldn't text me back. Friday at school I got a call from my mom, she told me his mom doesn't want me texting him at all anymore or call him at all. I SERIOUSLY DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO

February 12th, 2009, 11:54 AM
It sounds like your parents and his parents think your spending to much time together
I dont know what to say bout this..
But maybe you could try talking to them

February 12th, 2009, 02:41 PM
I felt human again, i felt wanted.

OK, maybe I'm over analyzing this, but I think that quote is very telling. A boyfreind can make you feel a lot of ways, but 'Human', and 'Wanted' really suggest that something else is going on for you for him to be THAT important to your sense of self. maybe that's what both your parents are responding to, the intensity of this relationship?

I think you should ask your folks what the concern is, but you might also ask yourself why Ruben has been so central to your sense of who you are. Is there something missing? Addressing that might be a good idea, b/c it would free you to be in a relationship based on what the person brings to you, rather than what it is you feel you're lacking.

February 12th, 2009, 03:25 PM
Try talking to your mom about it. Try not to get dramatic and scream "i love him! i love him!" because then you're just going to sound immature and obviously not ready to have such a serious relationship. You're young and your moms probably don't think you're mature enough to be together and might do things too fast. They're just looking out for the both of you, and if you understand that, let your mom know.
Just tell her how you feel, and try not to see his mom and yours as the enemy, they really are just looking out for you and for Ruben.

Midsummer Nights
February 15th, 2009, 01:50 PM
If you love him that much, than you really have to stick up to your mom and tell her that you are ready to have a serious relationship with him, and that she can't interfere with your life. Tell her to stop making choices for you and that you're a big girl. Tell her that you know that you'll always be mamma's little girl in her heart, but you have to grow up eventually. If she's a good mom, she'll understand, and hopefully un-ground you.

I hope that you 2 stay together for a long time.

Good Luck!

February 17th, 2009, 11:12 AM
thank you 4 your advice.... i still need advice on this pleze post more