My mom.

[lithium chain.]

I don't know how to deal with her anymore, and I'm afraid I'm going to end up doing something stupid.

To give a little background, we butt heads a lot over my dad (if that's what you want to call him.) There have been times when he calls my mom a whore and says he isn't sure whether any of us are is. He's a stone-cold alcoholic and he used to beat the hell out of me, my brother, and my sister. My brother then ended up beating on my sister and I, and then my sister joined in and for several years, I was always getting beaten up by someone in my mom's house.

I'll admit, firsthand, that I do start it with my mom sometimes. I can be mean to her, and I do get out of line. Part of it is just that I can be an ass, especially when I've had a bad day, and part of it is that I'm noticing a lot of unresolved anger with her for not trying to protect me from them when I couldn't do anything myself - and how she continues to deny that any of it ever happened, even though the neighbors and my friend's parents called the police time and time again because I'd come around with black eyes, covered in bruises, etc.

She wonders why I say she doesn't care... even though she threw me out in the middle of the winter, she always finds excuses for not taking me to the doctor (even though I have a potentially life-threatening condition right now) and she won't get me help with a drug problem that I have right now. It doesn't matter to her that I never know where I'm going to sleep from one night to the next.
I told her about how I was molested when I was younger... and she swears that she knew something like that was going on... and my point is... if you SERIOUSLY thought I was being sexually abused, why in HELL didn't you do anything to try and stop it?

My dad has thrown me out of the house several times, put knives to my throat, tried to hit me with ball bats, and god knows what else, and she defends him over me - and her other kids - every time, and she's supposed to care?

Tonight, I walked in her house and told her that I'm going to eat there when I want to (since I'm on her food stamp case,) etc, and that I dare anyone to say anything to me about it.

I'm getting mad because now she tries to deny that she ever told me to leave, she denies not taking me to the doctor (even though I have only canceled one doctor's appointment in the past year or so, and there's obviously a reason that I haven't made it to the operating table,) and now, she denies that my dad, my brother, or my sister ever did anything to me.

Tonight, I was trying to joke around with her, and talk to her, since she obviously think that I'm a piece of shit son that doesn't care about her... it ended in her screaming at me and threatening to have me hauled off. So, I called her a bitch. Time and time again. It started with just trying to make an innocent joke, to her throwing personal things in my face, and me ending up calling her a two-faced lying bitch.

I don't want to come around here because her and my sister both went around telling people that I hit them and destroy things here (the biggest lies in history.) I don't prefer to be around people who treat me like shit and try to make me look like a bad person- what's so wrong about that?

I'm half tempted to go grab a hammer and bust the windows out of the bitch's car. I love my mother, but I really don't like her right now.

I don't know what to do anymore.

She's so caught up in a web of lies... and denial... that she just can't see it. And some days, I feel like I'm getting pulled into it.

This is a great mother's day.

[george]

Well personally I wouldn't do this but somehow I just thought of this. Do something that would get you sent to the emergency room and have them call your mom. When the doctors check you out and see that there are bruises and what not, your mom would have to somehow explain that. Of course that could totally backfire and she could just make up more and more lies.....

Give more detail on what your mom does like a job.....then I could help you out more :D

[IAMSAM]

I think you got this one right (unfortunately). Your mom is in pretty deep denial, she cannot see what's going on very clearly or accurately. For whatever reason, it's easier for her to see nothing than this whole ugly mess. Yuck.

My advice would be for you to get as many supports as you can to compensate for the lack of it at home. it doesn't sound like she can currently provide you with that. breaking her windows, yelling at her,or whatever else you might feel like doing will not work, you know. Severe denial is like a bullett proof vest.

You can start with Al Anon, that's a teen resource (that's free) for kids of alcoholic parents. Also, you might avail yourself to as many after school activities as you can, not only can you make some important connections, but have some fun, too. That seems to be missing form your life now.

As for the drugs your abusing, well, you know that's not a good thing, you should stop mfor many reasons, but maybe one of the best is that of you don't you could turn out like them.

[Uhh.Huhh RAN_DOM]

yea man shes in nothing but DENAIL i hate to sound like every other person here but i know what your going thourgh right now cause iam dealing with the same thing right now... but all iam gonna say to you is try to go to the ER or something (you can use public transportation can't you) and get the police involed i know you may not want to tell on your parents then you might just have to do that if it gets severe enough and punching out windows and stuff such as that will on go aganist you same with drugs and drinking but maybe even calling cps to bring a social worker in or a welfare worker to help your family out

[Fezzie]

I think you might need to pay a visit to the school psychologist. And have him or her sit down with you and your mother and talk about this whole ordeal.

Your mother needs parenting classes.

Your Dad needs to go to an AA meeting.