PDA

View Full Version : Bipolar but... not really?


RazorTourniquet
September 7th, 2015, 07:50 AM
I'm kind of sick of this frequent self- analysis thing and I suppose many of you will tell me not to diagnose myself but anyways.
I am 17 y.o. and I was in therapy from September 2014 to April 2015. My therapist never really diagnosed me because I suppose she didn't believe in labeling? I am not sure. But she mentioned that I have " major/ general depression'' judging by what I'd told her. But I think I wasn't completely honest throughout the whole process. Not intentionally, of course. I also ended therapy with no warning after I thought I got better. I told her I'd been feeling awfully depressed for the past year. And I believed it was so till recently I took a look back in time. I realized that the summer of 2014 I actually felt quite confident, I was going out, working with great pleasure and success, I was body positive and kind of promiscuous, I abused alchohol and drugs sometimes . I also put myself in minor risk like getting in strangers' cars, going out late at night alone just for the chill of it and such.
This summer I barely walk out of my apartment without feeling crippling anxiety and I only do it when it gets dark so no one sees me, I punish my body, I overeat and I can't sleep, I am failing at my studies and keeping up with my work. Not to mention I get delusional in my happy episodes and dissociated in the sad ones. Sometimes those usually distinct behaviours mix togheter.
So I want to ask you all- are my happy episodes even close to the definition of being hyper or is it just plain, simple depression?

P.S. Sorry for the long post

Fiction
September 25th, 2015, 11:49 AM
Being delusional during a manic episode is definitely a classic symptom of Bipolar disorder, and what usually makes the difference between a diagnoses of depression or bipolar. How frequently are you getting these episodes? And what type of delusions are you getting?

Also "mixed episodes" can occur in Bipolar, which is a combination of depressive and manic symptoms.

You do seem to exhibit some of the symptoms of Bipolar, but the only way to know for sure is to see someone again, and be honest this time.

RazorTourniquet
October 13th, 2015, 11:50 AM
Thank you for your reply! I probably will in a month or so.