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View Full Version : I cant tell anyon, but u want to


vboy
August 4th, 2015, 03:32 PM
I know why I have such a hard time telling people im gay
It begins with the fact that I have aspergers syndrome (ive heard all the ass burgers references haha verry funny) which is a fourm of asd, u wanna know more then google it! Any way this makes me in many many ways socially aquard. And because of that I got bullied lot, I was called names, made fun of, given grief etc etc. Now some of th names I was called were poof, gay, faggot, gayboy, homo etc etc, not cause they were homophobic but because it was s1 s2 and s3 and they only did that to annoy or insult me. Proble, was tho this was the earley stages in puberty for me and this then made me confused, was I feeling attracted to guys because I was being told constantley I was attracted to guys or was I lying to my self because I diddnt want to prove those bastards right. Now I know I am gay (like 95% shure) and teling people is hard because every time im about to open my mouth I freze, I just cant do it, I then think of the riddicule and the torment ( again not homophobic just whinding me up ) and I know thas had an affect on me and I diont know. They say tnat u shouldnt let it get to u but all they years of pulling a brave face and trying to ignore what they are saying has left me with a mental scar. Just egnore them tney said, their only being silly they said. Well now thats what plays through my head every time I try to say the words I am gay out loud. I havent even done that btw, not even to a mirror, I open my mouth and all I get is static. I know those people are not homophobicm several of them have the same gay friend(s) and tneir fine but its the years of hearing otherwise thats whats bothering me. I dont know. I know that step 1 to solving a mental problem is getting to the rout cause but if anyone knows what the hell step 2 is id love to hear it.

Im in a state
I want to cry and I am slightly but I have every instinct telling me not to
I want to tell people but I have every instinct telling me not to aswell
I want to break something but ive got nothing to breaak
I want to punch someone but that would solve nothing
I want to rip someones face off but thats illegal
Most of all
I want someone to hug
Someone I can talk to
A friend whos willing to listen and who I can trust

Interstellar
August 4th, 2015, 05:56 PM
I have Asperger's too, so I know what you mean when you're saying how hard it is for you to tell someone about this. Most of the time when I'm in a situation like this it's because I'm scared of being judged. I'm afraid of what the people who hear me are going to say and how they are going to react. While I may not know just how to solve your problem, I'll always be here if you just wanna talk to someone about it :)

vboy
August 5th, 2015, 05:24 AM
I have Asperger's too, so I know what you mean when you're saying how hard it is for you to tell someone about this. Most of the time when I'm in a situation like this it's because I'm scared of being judged. I'm afraid of what the people who hear me are going to say and how they are going to react. While I may not know just how to solve your problem, I'll always be here if you just wanna talk to someone about it :)

Thank you
Normally ive got the opposite problem (what with the impulsuvity in all) where I kinna say too much. But this is something I really struggle with

Gene
August 5th, 2015, 05:15 PM
I think everyone struggles with telling people they're gay. So I can't even imagine how hard it must be with aspergers. I myself am still struggling to figure my own sexuality out so I can't give any advice for coming out, but I hope you find a way to tell people that works for you. Just remember: everything's gonna be totally fine! You're awesome, don't get upset or anything! It's going to turn out great! Let me know if you need some more encouragement or something (:

vboy
August 5th, 2015, 06:28 PM
I think everyone struggles with telling people they're gay. So I can't even imagine how hard it must be with aspergers. I myself am still struggling to figure my own sexuality out so I can't give any advice for coming out, but I hope you find a way to tell people that works for you. Just remember: everything's gonna be totally fine! You're awesome, don't get upset or anything! It's going to turn out great! Let me know if you need some more encouragement or something (:

Thank you
Its just hard sometimes
Plus im horrible at maaking friends so I dont have people to talk about this sorta stuff with
I mean, in primary I got the top IQ score out of my class yet I cant work out the stupid rules thsat the neurotypicals (NT) go by.

Gene
August 5th, 2015, 06:46 PM
That's of your control though. It's not something that's wrong with what you're doing, friend. You're don't what you can and you don't have it too bad right? You seem pretty strong, I'm positive you'll manage pretty well. If you need to talk, you can always PM me :)

vboy
August 5th, 2015, 07:26 PM
That's of your control though. It's not something that's wrong with what you're doing, friend. You're don't what you can and you don't have it too bad right? You seem pretty strong, I'm positive you'll manage pretty well. If you need to talk, you can always PM me :)

Yea
Still some times it gets soo frustrating

Gene
August 5th, 2015, 09:03 PM
Well, you just have to take it day by day. Don't force yourself to tell anyone about being gay besides like your parents and stuff. Don't make yourself uncomfortable doing it, wait until you're ready. Someday you'll be so tired of people not knowing and then you'll be able to tell them. It'll be fine!! :)

vboy
August 6th, 2015, 02:51 PM
Well, you just have to take it day by day. Don't force yourself to tell anyone about being gay besides like your parents and stuff. Don't make yourself uncomfortable doing it, wait until you're ready. Someday you'll be so tired of people not knowing and then you'll be able to tell them. It'll be fine!! :)

But I am tired of people not knowing
Im tired of lying to keep thesecret
An Im tired of having such difficulty saying three stupid words
I AM GAY

Gene
August 6th, 2015, 06:57 PM
Of course you're tired of it, who wouldn't be. But you can't stress yourself out so much about it if you just can't say it yet. Do you know how people will react? Like is that part of the problem maybe?

vboy
August 10th, 2015, 04:08 AM
Of course you're tired of it, who wouldn't be. But you can't stress yourself out so much about it if you just can't say it yet. Do you know how people will react? Like is that part of the problem maybe?

mabey
i know that most people are preetty tolerant in my area

Andre 99
August 25th, 2015, 12:38 PM
I also have aspergers' syndrome.
I know how hard it can be with wanting to tell people but not being able to (when normally people have to tell you to be quiet cos you can't stop talking) :)

When did you get diagnosed?

Quartz
August 29th, 2015, 07:41 AM
You don't have to tell anyone if you feel you aren't ready. To be perfectly honest, some people don't even need to know.

Just JT
August 31st, 2015, 09:31 AM
You know, it is hard, we've all been there at some point in time in varying degrees
In the end, it won't really matter will it? I wouldn't get all hyped up on a label, cause we're still growing, body's changing, hormones blah blah blah right?
Just follow your instincts, and do what feels right. Your sexuality is nobody's business, unless you want to share that with someone, and that's just going to be like a natural thing for you to say to that person when your ready to tell them. And when that happens, your going to trust that person enough to tell them, and they are not going to be suprised or really care, because they already accepted you for who you are
So relax, and have fun bro!!