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Syrum
June 13th, 2014, 04:19 PM
Well. I have few issues with my dad. I no longer have any family left, besides him. Lost my mom, but that is behind. So, my dad tends to be... Um.... He's ex-military. So he tends to be that. That kind of guy. Anyway, I only see him... Maybe two weeks every month. His business takes him out of country much. So, when I do see him. He tends to be depressed, and slightly drunk. I see him, and I get hurt. He beats, which I don't like to say, but it happens. So, whenever he comes him I tend stay with friends. This I do not like, because I'm not close to him, and I do believe I should, but every time I try and talk with him, I get hurt. Anyway, thanks people

CosmicNoodle
June 13th, 2014, 04:22 PM
Hmm...tough one. Could you try talking with him when he's sober? Explain carefully that he tends to accidently hurt you sometimes, and that when he does hurt you he's often drunk.
Any close family friends you could tell and ask for help?

Syrum
June 13th, 2014, 04:28 PM
Usually when sober (Non-drunk, I think..) He's gone. I do not see much. Though, I do not believe it's accidentally hurt. What would I do if I ask for help, many friends know this, and they offer to house me. Family, have non that I close too. I mean, I think he gets upset from his military service, or is what I assume. (Sorry for my poor English skills.)

CosmicNoodle
June 13th, 2014, 04:34 PM
Usually when sober (Non-drunk, I think..) He's gone. I do not see much. Though, I do not believe it's accidentally hurt. What would I do if I ask for help, many friends know this, and they offer to house me. Family, have non that I close too. I mean, I think he gets upset from his military service, or is what I assume. (Sorry for my poor English skills.)

Don't worry about your English skills, doesn't matter

Well, if its a big problem, couldn't you call the cops?

Syrum
June 13th, 2014, 04:36 PM
Oh, yes. Cops here... No. Besides, best possible outcome is I placed with dad's brother, whom is worse than him, but looks great on a piece of paper. He's ex-military, has a college degree. He seems good, but him and my dad are close, and he also has anger issues. So, I do not want to get involved with Government.

CosmicNoodle
June 13th, 2014, 04:46 PM
Well then, I'm afraid I don't have any answers, all I can do is wish you good luck

Syrum
June 13th, 2014, 04:48 PM
Ah, thank you every way. Much appreciated.

TheLoneWolf
June 13th, 2014, 04:51 PM
Hmmm, sounds like a very difficult situation! I wish I could give you a direct solution but sadly a cannot think of one...
I want to wish you a lot of luck!

Syrum
June 13th, 2014, 09:19 PM
It's fine. I deal with it. It's only half a month. Thank goodness.

Dalcourt
June 13th, 2014, 10:38 PM
Well. I have few issues with my dad. I no longer have any family left, besides him. Lost my mom, but that is behind. So, my dad tends to be... Um.... He's ex-military. So he tends to be that. That kind of guy. Anyway, I only see him... Maybe two weeks every month. His business takes him out of country much. So, when I do see him. He tends to be depressed, and slightly drunk. I see him, and I get hurt. He beats, which I don't like to say, but it happens. So, whenever he comes him I tend stay with friends. This I do not like, because I'm not close to him, and I do believe I should, but every time I try and talk with him, I get hurt. Anyway, thanks people

Hm, that's tough. What do you think triggers your Dad's violence? I mean are there any particular things that upset him and let him act violent? Or is it just once he's drunk he gets abusive? Do you think he has issues that make him drink or does he just drink for fun? Sorry I ask so many questions but I try to understand your situation.

Syrum
June 13th, 2014, 11:30 PM
Well, he's pretty abusive without, but. Not as. It's because of his military service in Chechnya, I sure of that. But at work he's fine. Then here I bare full front of it. He also drinks for fun. Drinking is a pretty standard thing here.

Dalcourt
June 14th, 2014, 10:31 PM
Hm, well as long as you Dad doesn't see that he has a problem with his drinking and some trauma from the past, I don't think talking to him about how you feel in this situation won't do any good... I speak from experience here. From what you said above I see you don't have any other family you could live with...and as I assume you don't want to live in some kind of youth shelter I guess you have only the same option I have, try to be not around when your Dad is angry, try to avoid situations that make him angry and just bear it.
I'm sorry but if there were any better solution I'd be glad myself...

Stronk Serb
June 19th, 2014, 03:33 AM
Service in Chechnya? Maybe he has some trauma from his service there? Drinking for fun is common here too so I get what he is doing. The government won't be of any help just like here, but I can't really come up with any good advice. Maybe find a momend when he's sober and talk to him, even though it's unlikely he will be sober when with you.

ViolinPro
June 25th, 2014, 10:02 AM
Hey I see your from Russia )
I speak fluent russian if anything, so just message me sometime if you want :D
I have a dad who had.. mm.. some interesting disorders going on, he was a very complex person.
With these kind of people it's important to understand how to relax and calm them down, not making them rage so much. When you show yourself as a weak person, they sense your fear and subsequently want you to hurt you even more.
If he doesn't bother you, then stay with your friends and to yourself as much as possible, just keep out of the way)