PDA

View Full Version : Anxious about... pretty much everything, but at the same time uncaring?


Remora
June 10th, 2014, 02:43 PM
I don't know *what* i am, but i'm weird. Just saying.
So i feel uncomfortable about pretty much anything and it gets much, much worse when i'm in vicinity of my crush (and it was already terrible).

At the same time -i guess it's some kind of mental disease- i go into these uncaring sprees of acting otherworldly to gather as much attention as possible.

During them, i cannot control myself.
After them, i want to punch my head trough a wall.

And i'm trying, honestly, to resist these ...i'll call them attacks... but i seem to fail over and over again. After them i don't have the guts to apologise because i don't want to bring up the subject.

And i'm uncomfortable with a ton of things, some that don't even make sense.
Among those things are wearing shirts that aren't completely black, white or gray... i guess it's fear of beeing judged according to clothes worn?
Another thing is not having a bit of my body covered in clothes. Only having my arms uncovered makes me feel a bit anxious already, changing at PE is a rush through hell.
I'm uncomfortable with looking in peoples' eyes, i'm uncomfortable with speaking to strangers, i'm uncomfortable with alot of things, nearly everything...

Am i fine? Do i have some kind of terrible mental disease? What am I ;_;

Miserabilia
June 10th, 2014, 02:59 PM
I don't know *what* i am, but i'm weird. Just saying.
So i feel uncomfortable about pretty much anything and it gets much, much worse when i'm in vicinity of my crush (and it was already terrible).

At the same time -i guess it's some kind of mental disease- i go into these uncaring sprees of acting otherworldly to gather as much attention as possible.

During them, i cannot control myself.
After them, i want to punch my head trough a wall.

And i'm trying, honestly, to resist these ...i'll call them attacks... but i seem to fail over and over again. After them i don't have the guts to apologise because i don't want to bring up the subject.

And i'm uncomfortable with a ton of things, some that don't even make sense.
Among those things are wearing shirts that aren't completely black, white or gray... i guess it's fear of beeing judged according to clothes worn?
Another thing is not having a bit of my body covered in clothes. Only having my arms uncovered makes me feel a bit anxious already, changing at PE is a rush through hell.
I'm uncomfortable with looking in peoples' eyes, i'm uncomfortable with speaking to strangers, i'm uncomfortable with alot of things, nearly everything...

Am i fine? Do i have some kind of terrible mental disease? What am I ;_;

I have literaly ALL the things you described in your post.

At the same time -i guess it's some kind of mental disease- i go into these uncaring sprees of acting otherworldly to gather as much attention as possible.

During them, i cannot control myself.
After them, i want to punch my head trough a wall.

And i'm trying, honestly, to resist these ...i'll call them attacks... but i seem to fail over and over again. After them i don't have the guts to apologise because i don't want to bring up the subject.

I do this all the time, I just start to do strange things because I'm not thinking about what I'm doing, and then I regret this.

And i'm uncomfortable with a ton of things, some that don't even make sense.
Among those things are wearing shirts that aren't completely black, white or gray... i guess it's fear of beeing judged according to clothes worn?
Another thing is not having a bit of my body covered in clothes. Only having my arms uncovered makes me feel a bit anxious already, changing at PE is a rush through hell.

OCD-like anxiety tics and rituals, same with me.

I'm uncomfortable with looking in peoples' eyes, i'm uncomfortable with speaking to strangers,

This is almost textbook social anxiety.

It took me a while to start figuring myself out too. It turns out I have pretty severe social anxiety, but only on several levels; it doesn't bother me when I'm in a a close group of friends, only strangers or speaking to a group of people.

Take this test to find out more about social anxiety. Answer as honest as possible. (http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/disorder/liebowitz/)

This should give you a good idea.
I got somewhere around 107 on the Liebowitz scale which is severe, and my friends wouldn't even suspect, so things like this are really complicated.

Hope this helped.

Remora
June 10th, 2014, 03:05 PM
Hope this helped.

Oh well...
I only had severe and usually on the second part (i can't stand ANY of those things seriously) and just one Often... my score is 105 ;_;

Miserabilia
June 10th, 2014, 03:09 PM
Oh well...
I only had severe and usually on the second part (i can't stand ANY of those things seriously) and just one Often... my score is 105 ;_;

Derp actualy my score was higher too.
My total was 107 so we are almost the same!

Remora
June 10th, 2014, 03:12 PM
You lied to me ! Whyyyyy :c

Miserabilia
June 10th, 2014, 03:15 PM
You lied to me ! Whyyyyy :c

I don't know I'm so sorry ;_;
I have terrible long term memory with stuff like this, so I redid the test.
But anyway, I can totaly relate to you!!!
Seriously, I read your post and it felt like I was seeing myself described!
We have exactly the same s*t going on, whatever it is..

Remora
June 10th, 2014, 03:18 PM
Really? ;A;

Miserabilia
June 10th, 2014, 03:20 PM
Really? ;A;

yes and now we must dance together dance thE DANCE OF LIFE
no wait but seriously yes.
I feel exactly like this, and it took me a while to figure out that I was socialy anxious and not just randomly scared of strangers.
For example, going to supermarkets, notice a stranger looking at me, making eye contact, I always tear up and feel like running away, etc.
It's social anxiety, as far as I can read from your post.
Also anxiety in general, which is not unccomonly activated in teens because of (social) pressure.

Remora
June 10th, 2014, 03:21 PM
Is it a negative properrty- does it like, creep people out?