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thatgothgirluknow
March 27th, 2014, 08:58 PM
3 times 3 fucking times its fucking happened 3 times ive been sexualy asalted and im fucking sick of it why the hell are some men such pigs 3 differnt men three times 3 differnt places most people dnt even have it happen once why does this keep happening to me i mean its not i dress slutty or anything is it my fault? i keep thinking i shouldnt have been at the sleepover i knew he liked me and i knew he was trouble even if it was my friends bday and i knew that the other guy was drunk i sat by the other guy at camp knowing he was on parrol and was flirting with me and threatning to hurt me so why the fuck did i do any of this is it all my fault maybe i somehow deserve it

Katiya
March 28th, 2014, 12:16 AM
Noooo. Its not your fault! That kind of thing never is! Its the fault of the pigs that did it. They are wrong!

Sadly I have to agree, many men are pigs. Some are nice and respectful but others are just well, horrible.

I've had guys do that to me before. Shoot I dressed as awful as I could, old shirts and jeans, no makeup messy hair and they still did it. Its just an act of disrespect. Its vulgar and wrong. If you could I'd give the next one a good kick in the nuts. Lol that got the point across for me years back. Try being more assertive if you aren't already.

For me when I feel uncomfortable I kinda don't know what to do, I just want to leave. So I do but usually quietly, it may benefit me more to be more loud and aggressive in saying no. I've had it beat into me to not speak even when something is wrong. So I know it can be hard.

Bolwing
March 28th, 2014, 01:36 PM
No matter what you do, you don't 'deserve' to be sexually assaulted. The fuckwits that assaulted you are the only ones to blame. A victim of sexual assault is NEVER responsible for the actions of the culprit, no matter what.

Tarannosaurus
March 29th, 2014, 06:27 AM
Those men are disgusting cowards, they're beneath you, worthless. It's not your fault, not the least bit your fault. You don't deserve it at all, don't think that for a moment :hug3:

thatgothgirluknow
March 29th, 2014, 03:23 PM
thx guys my mom blames it on me though

Tarannosaurus
March 29th, 2014, 05:10 PM
thx guys my mom blames it on me though

I'm in less of a situation than you but I'll tell you exactly what my teacher, psychiatrist and best friend's mother told me (and this is word for word what one of them said) - '"your mother is just plain wrong and needs to get her sh*t sorted. You are her daughter and should be her top priority. She made her choices and that's her problem, but never believe that you are to blame. Don't let her hold you back, you do what you need to do to get better". I hope that showing you other opinions will make you see that parents can be wrong, it's absolutely not your fault xx

thatgothgirluknow
March 29th, 2014, 08:12 PM
I'm in less of a situation than you but I'll tell you exactly what my teacher, psychiatrist and best friend's mother told me (and this is word for word what one of them said) - '"your mother is just plain wrong and needs to get her sh*t sorted. You are her daughter and should be her top priority. She made her choices and that's her problem, but never believe that you are to blame. Don't let her hold you back, you do what you need to do to get better". I hope that showing you other opinions will make you see that parents can be wrong, it's absolutely not your fault xx thx i tlked to y friend today so im feeling allot better

ScottishCanary
March 30th, 2014, 04:48 PM
Just saw this thread, glad you are feeling better.

If you are sexually assaulted it's never your fault. It doesn't matter what you were wearing, whether he was drunk or you were drunk or how you were acting or what you said. The blame lies 100% with the piece of trash that sexually assaulted you. It's such a horrible thing to do and only horrible people do it.

radsniper
March 30th, 2014, 08:54 PM
it's not your fault and your mom is totally wrong in this situation so keep your head up and don't ever believe the lies :hug3:

DiamondsGirl
March 31st, 2014, 07:28 AM
thx guys my mom blames it on me though

it does not mean you should believe her though! she's just nuts.

Since everyone else has covered up everything I wanted to say, I'm just gonna ask this: so are you alright?

thatgothgirluknow
March 31st, 2014, 09:20 AM
it does not mean you should believe her though! she's just nuts.

Since everyone else has covered up everything I wanted to say, I'm just gonna ask this: so are you alright? yeah im feeling allot better i have my ups and downs thx for asking

DiamondsGirl
April 1st, 2014, 03:42 AM
glad to hear that :) it's the most important thing x

John566
April 5th, 2014, 04:20 AM
No, you don't deserve it. Don't ever think that. I hope you went to the police about those scumbags.

DeadEyes
April 5th, 2014, 12:46 PM
You cannot deserve to be raped,
Even no matter how it may seem like "you are looking for it"
it gives no right to anybody to force you to have sex.
Even if you agreed at 1st but want it to stop once it started,
it gives no right to anybody to force you to continue having sex.
By the way Jordan, you have an horrible mother.

Rocket Raccoon
April 5th, 2014, 01:12 PM
You need to fight back and not let anyone force you to do anything you dont want. Kick and scream if you have to and stand up for yourself. Theres strength in all of us we just got to let it out.

Tarannosaurus
April 6th, 2014, 11:55 AM
You need to fight back and not let anyone force you to do anything you dont want. Kick and scream if you have to and stand up for yourself. Theres strength in all of us we just got to let it out.

She's not the problem, they are. She shouldn't get questioned or blamed, it's not on her. None of this is her fault.

Rocket Raccoon
April 6th, 2014, 12:38 PM
She's not the problem, they are. She shouldn't get questioned or blamed, it's not on her. None of this is her fault.

Its not her fault at all. She just needs to stick up for herself so this doesnt happen anymore.
Cause it doesnt look like her moms gonna do it for her.

Awesomeguy13
April 6th, 2014, 02:26 PM
This isn't your fault.

Darth Vader
April 6th, 2014, 09:57 PM
Not your fault but you must be doing something to egg them on if it's happened 3 times.

Maybe associate yourself with a better crowd ?

Katiya
April 7th, 2014, 02:03 AM
Not your fault but you must be doing something to egg them on if it's happened 3 times.

Maybe associate yourself with a better crowd ?

She's not doing anything. A woman does not egg on some one to rape her or other ways adult her. It doesn't matter if they are shy or wear short skirts or who they hang with.

Its likely she has developed some kind of hateful reputation and men are doing it because the word is "hey man we can get away with it on this girl". Which is sick. But it does happen all to often. Especially when no one believes the victem. Because people are getting away with it making an easy target.

thatgothgirluknow
April 14th, 2014, 12:14 AM
You cannot deserve to be raped,
Even no matter how it may seem like "you are looking for it"
it gives no right to anybody to force you to have sex.
Even if you agreed at 1st but want it to stop once it started,
it gives no right to anybody to force you to continue having sex.
By the way Jordan, you have an horrible mother.
thx i love her i guess she just doesnt understand we fight allot but shes not that bad
Not your fault but you must be doing something to egg them on if it's happened 3 times.

Maybe associate yourself with a better crowd ? it happened at church my own house with my grandpa and a close freinds brother i dnt think the crowd is exactly to bad looking

She's not doing anything. A woman does not egg on some one to rape her or other ways adult her. It doesn't matter if they are shy or wear short skirts or who they hang with.

Its likely she has developed some kind of hateful reputation and men are doing it because the word is "hey man we can get away with it on this girl". Which is sick. But it does happen all to often. Especially when no one believes the victem. Because people are getting away with it making an easy target.
thx idk if thats whats happening but i wont let it happen again

Katiya
April 14th, 2014, 01:08 AM
thx i love her i guess she just doesnt understand we fight allot but shes not that bad
it happened at church my own house with my grandpa and a close freinds brother i dnt think the crowd is exactly to bad looking


thx idk if thats whats happening but i wont let it happen again

It could be your area too. Where I am its unlikely I would be raped or any other assult. But say in the bad side of town or a city like Detroit my changes of assault of any type would go up dramaticly.
Even some qquaint little towns are awful so that could also be a factor. Even the opinions of the community.

darkangel91
April 14th, 2014, 11:53 AM
My suggestion, somewhat mischievous, is that you find the guys who did this and find a way to humiliate them publicly in front of all their friends. :D

No, don't really do that. Don't worry, it's not your fault. Honestly it's nobody's fault. People who do that probably have major problems of their own. Maybe they've been abused themselves, maybe they're alcoholic or mentally ill somehow. Probably had friends egging them on. You need to love yourself and realize that it's not your fault, maybe get a big sturdy boyfriend to protect you :), and someday, find it in your heart to forgive the people who did this to you. Forgiveness is the best revenge. But it'll be a long time before you'll even be able to consider that. I'm sure you're a wonderful person and you're doing nothing wrong. Love yourself, forgive your mother for her narrowminded views, and someday, find it your heart to forgive your abusers.

Hope this helps. :)

Gottaloveaginger14
July 12th, 2014, 05:10 PM
I completely understand how you feel
I was molested and forced into human trafficking as a kid and then I was rapped and I got pregnant from it about a year ago by the guy I was dating. Some things just suck...
Check out my blog if you wanna know a little more or pm me if you wanna talk

coolkid016
August 11th, 2014, 08:53 PM
no its not your fault.. and your mom was dead wrong to say that

deadpie
August 15th, 2014, 06:09 PM
3 times 3 fucking times its fucking happened 3 times ive been sexualy asalted and im fucking sick of it why the hell are some men such pigs 3 differnt men three times 3 differnt places most people dnt even have it happen once why does this keep happening to me i mean its not i dress slutty or anything is it my fault? i keep thinking i shouldnt have been at the sleepover i knew he liked me and i knew he was trouble even if it was my friends bday and i knew that the other guy was drunk i sat by the other guy at camp knowing he was on parrol and was flirting with me and threatning to hurt me so why the fuck did i do any of this is it all my fault maybe i somehow deserve it

Rape is rape, nobody deserves it. It doesn't matter what you wear or if you're under the influence. I know someone that was sexually abused more than three times at different points in her life. She's stronger than ever now. No matter what happens there is always hope.

It's what we all say when we go through these events. "It's my fault" or "I deserved it". I still say it to myself all the time. It doesn't matter - it's never your fault. I was sexually abused as a child and was later on hurt again. I didn't even report the second person - I think only four people know about that and one of them called me a liar. Which is proof that people that haven't gone through what we have gone through are just plain ignorant. And to be honest men can be fucking pigs. I'm male and believe this to be true.

Does anyone know about what's happened? I'd advise telling a school councilor or an adult with authority power. Telling parents is definitely harder, but if that's your only option then you'll have to go there. You need to find someone to talk to - have to find a therapist. Surviving what you have without talking to a professional is extremely difficult.. Although it can be hard to find a good therapist, you can find the right one.

Start getting into art and also start working out. Maybe look into kickboxing or something that can teach you how to fight. It's been proven in studies that when someone is sexually abused they're likely to be abused again due to the behaviors they show and such.. We feel weak when it happens to us and that's what a monster looks for, although you don't have to be. You can be strong. You already are for saying this and being alive.

There's TONS of people on VT that have gone through similar things. It's an extremely diverse website and even people that haven't been abused might know what you're going through as well. Don't be afraid to message people here. You can find a community of support and help (although realize we're just teenagers and young adults, not professionals). You can even talk to me, although I seem scary to a lot of people on here so it's ok if you don't.

You're never alone and none of it is EVER your fault. NEVER. NEVER!!

gothy
August 15th, 2014, 11:52 PM
No its not your fault.
Consent is ur responsibility. Rape is a crime.
Dress has nothing to do with it.

Strategy to defend oneself from rape: Kick the guys and scratch the girls face. Carry keys. Carry pocket knife. Slash towards eyes.

Ive never been raped. But if i am ever in danger. I use this. Never had to yet

gothy
August 15th, 2014, 11:52 PM
No its not your fault.
Consent is ur responsibility. Rape is a crime.
Dress has nothing to do with it.

Strategy to defend oneself from rape: Kick the guys and scratch the girls face. Carry keys. Carry pocket knife. Slash towards eyes.

Ive never been raped. But if i am ever in danger. I use this. Never had to yet

Osama Gulryz
August 16th, 2014, 04:48 AM
No Jordan it's not your fault, it never was, It don't matter how you dress, it's other was are fucking......... uh.... they make me angry, whatever, Leave those fuckers, forget them, I was always here for you and always will be :)

thatgothgirluknow
August 16th, 2014, 08:45 PM
No Jordan it's not your fault, it never was, It don't matter how you dress, it's other was are fucking......... uh.... they make me angry, whatever, Leave those fuckers, forget them, I was always here for you and always will be :)
:) ur awesome thx i love u