View Full Version : Ex is potentially trying to catfish me?

August 26th, 2017, 01:49 PM
Warning: Long read. I'll put a TL;DR at the end.

Soo my first 'serious' relationship ended back in January (during Year 13). Before the literal day leading up to the breakup, I thought we were in it for the long term. We had been dating for around 6-7 months; understood each other; made each other laugh; similar reserved personalities etc. Suddenly, she springs out that she 'doesn't feel like being in a relationship'. This was completely out of nowhere (just the day before I'd introduced her to a very good friend of mine, and she put on makeup for the occasion - something she never really did, suggesting she wanted to make a good lasting impression).

Anyway, we meet the next day, and she explains that she doesn't see any point for us to continue, as ultimately we don't have the same 'life aspirations' (in other words - she was, supposedly, massively into the idea of moving to Japan and becoming a photographer; I, obviously, wasn't overly keen on the idea at all, and this 'disagreement' was discussed occasionally, but usually put to bed quickly). She said that she 'still loved me', and that we should stay friends. Yeah, right.

July - good few weeks into the summer holidays. We haven't talked in months. Suddenly, I receive an instagram message from an unknown account. I have a look at the account - female name, follows accounts very similar to those that my ex would have followed (cosplayers), and, strikingly, follows one of my friends (who she once said was "hot"). She says that she's "looking for a boy". Based on the digging I did, I approached with great caution. She says that she lives in York, has had a relationship, and that we should meet to get 'acquainted'. I start noticing that her messages are being sent somewhat late in the evening/at night - I remember that my ex is currently in Japan on some exchange trip. I ask if she's away, with her replying that she's currently in Asia.

I confront her, asking if she's my ex. She poorly denies it, saying she's heard of her name before, but can't remember where from (-_-). She insists that we should meet, to which I agree. Whilst waiting for a reply, I message 'the friend' who I mentioned earlier - he too was on the Japan trip. I ask if he knows who this random account his. He replies saying he has no idea, but he's noticed that she's started following a load of people who follow him - firstly, this is a lie. Secondly, who keeps tabs on who's following your followers? I can usually tell when he's bsing by the language he uses online, and my spidey-senses tingled. I left it at that.

The next message I receive from the mystery account (after I agreed to meet with her) - "you're a ****", "I don't want to meet anymore", "bye". Well then. The conversation pretty much ended there (aside from me jokingly saying that it would be good if she wasn't my ex, as I 'still loved her').

This has still been bugging me for the last months. I want to know if it really was her as, despite the overwhelming evidence to suggest so, I'm intrigued by 'the friends' connection to all of this, and his strange responses to my questioning.

So what do I do? Message my ex, asking her directly? (the mystery account has been deleted).

TL;DR - Pretty sure my ex of around 5 months tried messaging me on an alternative account; after asking my friend about it, he gives a weird response (possibly connected to this whole thing), and she cancels our meeting. I wanna find the truth.

August 26th, 2017, 02:23 PM
If you want the truth I'd meet your ex and ask and Jude by how well you know her. If you don't care about the truth maybe just leave it.

August 28th, 2017, 04:38 PM
Well it looks to me that your ex and your friend are both involved in the mystery texts and girl that you received. That is most likely why she got prissy and cancelled your meeting is that she and your friend were talking about the texts they both got from you. I think that yes you need to ask your ex straight out if she was the mystery girl that sent you texts. If she is truthful then you will know for sure. Then your relationship goes where it goes from there.

August 31st, 2017, 09:58 AM
Is your ex now seeing your friend and they decided to play a trick on you together?