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Mynameisdean
April 12th, 2017, 11:29 AM
So, I asked my group chat if we could go up to the city and one of my friends (lets call him C) said 'Yes' he will go. A few of my friends said they can't go which is fair enough, at least they're being honest, great.

But then he asked me if he could bring a friend along and he will ask him. I said 'that's fine' but then he did not reply until I asked him the next day. He then said he 'can't go today' and neither can his friend so I decided to ask him to do it on Friday instead. We agreed.

But no doubt he will think of an excuse to not come again but I don't understand. If he can't go or does not want to go just say 'no'. I don't even feel like going this Friday because it's not the first time. He talks about meeting up all of the time but never bothers.

Now, I am trying to be open. Maybe he is socially inept and needs some time but am not too sure.

I don't go out too often and honestly question if I have friends sometimes but I don't know if I am overreacting to a situation like this.

Desynchronized
April 12th, 2017, 12:27 PM
Wrat about just stopping askin him?

jamie_n5
April 13th, 2017, 06:23 PM
Well I don't really know what he is thinking. He may have had things come up. You would think that if he didn't like you or didn't want to go somewhere he would just say no. Also Friday is Good Friday too so who knows what will happen. Just be there and keep trying to be a friend.

Emilyyy
April 14th, 2017, 02:46 AM
Could be that he has things going on that you don't now about with his family or that maybe he's not feeling great. Maybe try speaking to him, tell him you've realised you've not met up in a while even though you've kept trying and see what he says. Don't be too harsh about it but mention that you've realised he's cancelled a few times and you're worried incase something is up.

Just JT
April 14th, 2017, 07:01 AM
Sometimes life gets busy and plans change. Even after plans are made. But hey like someone else said it is Good Friday so something could be going on you weren't told

Seems to me if he's talking to you he must be ok with you right?

Stop inviting and see what happens...

Mynameisdean
April 14th, 2017, 06:08 PM
He's probably the least religious kid (I don't think anyone I know atm is even the slightest bit religious), so I think Good Friday is out of the question.

Anyway, I am trying to maintain friendships (I don't have much) but it's really annoying sometimes...

messid
April 14th, 2017, 09:28 PM
So, I asked my group chat if we could go up to the city and one of my friends (lets call him C) said 'Yes' he will go. A few of my friends said they can't go which is fair enough, at least they're being honest, great.

But then he asked me if he could bring a friend along and he will ask him. I said 'that's fine' but then he did not reply until I asked him the next day. He then said he 'can't go today' and neither can his friend so I decided to ask him to do it on Friday instead. We agreed.

But no doubt he will think of an excuse to not come again but I don't understand. If he can't go or does not want to go just say 'no'. I don't even feel like going this Friday because it's not the first time. He talks about meeting up all of the time but never bothers.

Now, I am trying to be open. Maybe he is socially inept and needs some time but am not too sure.

I don't go out too often and honestly question if I have friends sometimes but I don't know if I am overreacting to a situation like this.

Two things::
first, if he has social anxiety that might be why...he might want to hang out but then he gets really nervous or anxious when the day comes and flakes...one of my friends is like this and i know he will cancel sometimes so i just plan for it and expect a cancellation or two :D

second, if he doesnt, then maybe he doesnt know hes being rude. if you dont think he has social axiety and he keeps cancelling all the time then maybe its a good idea to talk to him about it and ask him (not like a confrontation) whats going on and why he cancels so much

Londongirl01
April 16th, 2017, 02:08 AM
Yeah, I would stop asking and see what they do. I think people are generally high maintenance! Try and figure out whats causing it- are they just being lazy with your friendship, or do they genuinely have loading going on right now that's preventing them for meeting...