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View Full Version : Are you still a virgin if you are raped?


christophe
March 24th, 2017, 12:55 AM
My Brother did Anal and oral sex often to me before i got into Foster care. I am still a Virgin?

lliam
March 24th, 2017, 01:06 AM
imo, if you consider you as a virgin, you still remain a virgin.

personally I would recommend you to forget this virginity stuff.
it only creates id-irritation and such.

clobo
March 24th, 2017, 02:08 AM
My Brother did Anal and oral sex often to me before i got into Foster care. I am still a Virgin?

That's awful, poor you. I would say you're a virgin. **hugs** x

Vegas2933
March 24th, 2017, 02:45 AM
I'm guessing it wasn't consential...? :(

christophe
March 24th, 2017, 02:51 AM
No��

Vegas2933
March 24th, 2017, 03:00 AM
No��

Omg I'm so sorry. While your tecnically not still a virgin, you can choose as to whether or not to count this as your first sexual experiance.

ChloeF
March 24th, 2017, 03:58 AM
Hugs, l hope you're ok.
Technically no. Given your background though, l'd accept that you are if you want to think that way.

Beauregard
March 24th, 2017, 07:15 PM
I'm sorry this happened to you.
I personally always thought the whole virginity thing overrated so I would advise not to think too much about it.
As the others said technically you aren't a virgin but it would be okay if you consider yourself one till your first consensual sexual intercourse.

pconnor
March 24th, 2017, 07:39 PM
Gosh, so sorry to hear that.

KingClyde
March 25th, 2017, 03:27 PM
I'm so sorry what happened to you, one thing I can say is think of it this way, everyone has 3 virginities. You technically lost 2 but you still (from my understanding) have one left. Most straight (I take from your post history) guys never lose those 2 so you're no different than anyone else. Regardless, chin up buddy; virginity doesn't matter anyway. There's only a physical difference in females as they have a hymen, we don't. Nobody will ever think anything of "virginity" in your case as long as they know what happened because it's not your fault. Remember, virginity is a social construct. It doesn't matter anyway :)

Michael M.
March 27th, 2017, 03:15 PM
you unwantedly got laid. That's really disgusting that it happened to you the way you did. I am sorry to hear.

ChrisM98
March 27th, 2017, 08:50 PM
So sorry to hear about that

Devinsoccer
March 27th, 2017, 08:57 PM
My Brother did Anal and oral sex often to me before i got into Foster care. I am still a Virgin?

I'm sorry to hear about this. Sadly, you are no longer a virgin. Any type of sex, concentual or not means you are no longer a virgin.

Shiny Moon
March 28th, 2017, 12:07 AM
Sorry to hear that :( And to answer your question, I don't think so.

bigwolf2
March 29th, 2017, 09:16 AM
Well, technically you are not. But if you choose so to not consider it as your first sexual experience, you are.

But I must say virginity is a very artificial concept.

Zachary G
March 29th, 2017, 10:21 AM
I am very sorry that happened to you, I hope you are in a better place now.

As everyone has pointed out, technically youre not a virgin because youve had intercourse. HOWEVER, since you never had vaginal intercourse, I would assume you hymen is still intact and that would make you a virgin still because you were never penetrated that way. This is just my opinion.

maddogmj77
April 1st, 2017, 05:40 AM
I am very sorry that happened to you, I hope you are in a better place now.

As everyone has pointed out, technically youre not a virgin because youve had intercourse. HOWEVER, since you never had vaginal intercourse, I would assume you hymen is still intact and that would make you a virgin still because you were never penetrated that way. This is just my opinion.

The OP is male.
The hymen is not a "virginity-detector".
You seem to be very misinformed, I would suggest watching this video.

Also, virginity is pretty much a made-up idea, there is no concrete definition.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PM79UBTwfsg

Zachary G
April 1st, 2017, 04:11 PM
The OP is male.
The hymen is not a "virginity-detector".
You seem to be very misinformed, I would suggest watching this video.

Also, virginity is pretty much a made-up idea, there is no concrete definition.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PM79UBTwfsg

I apologize for not paying attention to the OP's gender, thank you for pointing that out and for the video link.

jacob.neruda
September 20th, 2017, 10:02 AM
The dichotomy between "virgin" and "slut" is beginning to grate on my nerves. Whether you are a virgin or not is irrelevant: the whole obsession with virginity began in Biblical times, where Kings would demand their wives be virginal in order to ensure that the sons their wives would bear would be of the father's blood, and therefore, entitled to inherit the kingdom and it's wealth.

Nowadays, it is a meaningless concept except for the devoutly religious and the superstitious.

And so to answer the question as to whether the OP is a virgin: who's to say? It is up to the OP whether he believes this first sexual experience deserves canonisation as his "loss of virginity".

Does he think the loss of virginity is important for religious reasons? Then, no -- God would never impune anyone for having suffered sexual abuse. Is it for emotional reasons? Then it would depend if the OP is still a virgin or not -- does he feel that his event marked a significant chapter in his life (the same way that the loss of virginity came to be a rite of passage in Western culture, post-Victorian era)? Or is he just asking to ask -- pure semantics? Then undoubtedly yes: he was penetrated, and through that definition, lost his virginity.

Anyway, my dear Christophe -- hugs. I hope you are doing well. Feel free to PM me if you want to chat. We're with you, mate.

NewLeafsFan
September 24th, 2017, 12:47 AM
Personally, I think that you're a virgin. You did not have sex as a willing participant; you were abused.

If the abuse did not involve vaginal sex I don't think that anyone could not consider you a virgin.

You have my deepest sympathy for what you have been through.

MeganA
November 13th, 2017, 06:04 PM
no, but I'm sorry it happened to you.

Dalcourt
November 13th, 2017, 09:38 PM
OP banned :locked: