PDA

View Full Version : Need Advice for a Friend


AussieNicholas
March 14th, 2017, 06:16 AM
So I'm doing this on behalf of a friend of mine from school who's having a problem with her girlfriend and her parents. Just to clarify, we live in the state of Victoria, Australia, so anything related to the law has to apply to Victoria. However, I know my friend would appreciate any advice you all can offer.

Here's the situation as I've been told so far: My friend's girlfriend has very strict religious parents who I've been told are Catholic. According to my friend, the parents make all the girlfriend's decisions for her and place heavy restrictions on what she can and cannot do. Despite being nearly 18, her parents won't let her have social media of any kind, and ever since she came out as gay, have forbidden her from seeing her girlfriend (my friend) unless they are breaking up. They also heavily restrict where she goes (she's been too scared to go out as the suburb we live in is known for having a drug issue, even though you'll be fine if you keep to yourself) and they also won't let her go anywhere unless she has an invitation with full details of the event and they still question her about it. My friend has also said she thinks that the parents don't want her wandering around the suburb because it'll influence her (again, I'll state that the drug problem here is greatly exaggerated).

Any advice you guys can offer will be greatly appreciated by my friend (who has given me permission to post this on her behalf) and I. Thanks for taking your time to read this.

Just JT
March 14th, 2017, 09:51 AM
That's unfortunate. Sounds like the parents are not the type that would even talk about this at all.

She's almost 18. I'd stick to that goal as the parent can probably dominate her as they already are till then

At that time I'd simply stand up for myself and take the reprucussions as they come. She may find herself not living with her parents and cut off from all kinds of support. But in the end we need to be ourselves and happy.

Or live our lives to make others happy, and the expense of our lie happyness.

I know it's easier said than done. And a good plan needs to be put in place. If it can be done. Perhaps once her parents see her gone, and what that means for them, they may see some issues in another light, a more forgiving light for lack of better words

jamie_n5
March 24th, 2017, 07:57 PM
Wow that sounds extreme. She should talk to a school counselor I think for help and advice. I have somewhat the same thing in some ways. My parents won't allow cams and we can't have cell phones or any game systems . Other than that it isn't too hard. They did really flipped out when I came out as gay also but accepted me eventually.

Emilyyy
April 14th, 2017, 02:56 AM
Wow sounds pretty extreme to be honest, heard of people having strict parents before but this is the strictest I've heard about. Sadly there's not much that can be done short of moving out which may not be an option for her. She could try reasoning with her parents and letting them know how she feelsaid about all the restrictions but I doubt that will work. Only other thing I can think of is maybe try telling her to find someone her parents trust to speak to her parents on her behalf, maybe if it comes from someone her parents trust and respect...