PDA

View Full Version : I have a crush...


Equinox1
February 25th, 2017, 03:23 AM
I suppose this could fit in the dating subforum but I'd prefer to post it here since it is an LGBT subforum and I'm hoping the people here will be more familiar with the terms I'm using :whoops: So. This is probably going to sound stupid and like a bad idea but hear me out. I'm FTM, I've said so a few times but visit so infrequently that everybody's probably forgotten lol. And I'm 16 but turning 17 this year. I met a certain boy online 2 years ago, he is also FTM. He was 16 and I was 14, so he's turning 19 in August of this year. We know each other fairly well. I mean, we've shared things we wouldn't usually share with others, I've seen photos of him, I know his first and middle name (not his birth name obviously). It's not like this is a fake profile or anything. I don't think anyone could really fake being trans for a start. The thing is, firstly, we live in two different countries. I live in Australia and he's in the US. We met on this LGBT forum.

The problem is, I think I really love this guy and I don't think he feels the same way. I don't really know what he looks like, I do but then I forget a bit later on. I have a general idea from the photos but he posts them and then deletes them after a while because his parents aren't accepting, they don't know the sites he uses. I just like him because I feel like I can trust him and I can tell him stuff. Well, he said he's gay which is good for me :P but he said he's also asexual and he doesn't get crushes on people very easily so I doubt he'd be interested in me.

But is this a really stupid crush, could nothing ever come out of it? And I don't feel like I should ask but I want to know how I could hint that I'm interested or subtly ask how he feels...that's probably creepy though :rolleyes: What do I do here? Do I just drop the idea and move on?

maddogmj77
February 25th, 2017, 05:01 AM
The only way you'll ever find out is if you ask. He may not be open to the idea of a long-distance relationship however, or he may not feel the same way. But, the worst thing that could happen is he says no. I doubt that he would just stop talking to you, having known each other for so long. Give it a shot :)

Amethyst Rose
February 25th, 2017, 10:32 AM
No crush is a "stupid crush". You don't choose to have feelings for someone, you just do. And you'll never know until you ask. It can be nerve-wracking, so do it before you have time to talk yourself out of it (at least that's what I'd do :)). If he doesn't return your feelings, there's no reason you can't still be friends. In the case he says he likes you too, be careful; this is someone you've never met in person, so don't let your emotions override your logic completely and be cautious.

ska8er
February 25th, 2017, 03:50 PM
Keep contact with him and over time maybe
he will get closer to u and the two of u can
share feelings. There is no reason y the two
of u can b just friends even if it doesn't go
further. Tell him u think u have a crush on
him.

Equinox1
February 26th, 2017, 04:56 AM
Thanks for the replies, I've been asking a few questions and trying to build up to the big question (that is, does he like me too?) The only problem is, he's been really busy for the past week and we haven't been talking as often, I feel like maybe I'm being a bit of bother. He said I wasn't being annoying at all but I feel bad to keep asking questions. I feel awkward actually asking if he has a crush on me specifically, I mean I wouldn't even ask that question to someone I knew "in real life." I was going to ask him if he had a crush on anyone or how he felt about me (in general) but maybe that wouldn't be the best way to do it. If he asked me if I had a crush, I would lie and say no so he might do the same. He does like me a lot, I know that. He says that he cares about me, I'm amazing, I'm stronger than I believe, he's here for me, all that sort of stuff. I've said that and more back and he just says it means a lot to him that I care so much. I don't know if I've ever said I love him before, I've said I "really care" about him when what I should've done is replace that with "love." But I don't get if he's being nice or if he actually has deeper feelings for me :what:

Amethyst Rose
February 26th, 2017, 10:38 AM
Thanks for the replies, I've been asking a few questions and trying to build up to the big question (that is, does he like me too?) The only problem is, he's been really busy for the past week and we haven't been talking as often, I feel like maybe I'm being a bit of bother. He said I wasn't being annoying at all but I feel bad to keep asking questions. I feel awkward actually asking if he has a crush on me specifically, I mean I wouldn't even ask that question to someone I knew "in real life." I was going to ask him if he had a crush on anyone or how he felt about me (in general) but maybe that wouldn't be the best way to do it. If he asked me if I had a crush, I would lie and say no so he might do the same. He does like me a lot, I know that. He says that he cares about me, I'm amazing, I'm stronger than I believe, he's here for me, all that sort of stuff. I've said that and more back and he just says it means a lot to him that I care so much. I don't know if I've ever said I love him before, I've said I "really care" about him when what I should've done is replace that with "love." But I don't get if he's being nice or if he actually has deeper feelings for me :what:

I think you should wait until things have calmed down for him a bit before asking so he has less distractions. And when you do ask, just be direct about it. I know from personal experience how awkward it can be when you only hint to each other about how you're feeling and let it drop. I'm sure he will appreciate your courage to be up front with him.

RavenTheGoddess
April 14th, 2017, 04:34 PM
Is this still a relevant issue you are having? If so, then take my advice:

Do NOT make the same mistake I made. I had feelings for someone but I never got around to telling them out of fear of rejection. Eventually it came to a point to where I'd never get a chance to anymore. They moved to a different state.

If you really wanna know if someone loves you, just ask! If you have to, psyche yourself up in a mirror! Practice what you are going to say. Pretend he is listening and say it out loud to practice.