PDA

View Full Version : the shithole that is my life


Pyromaniac27
January 15th, 2017, 09:44 PM
alright, so here i am, help me, my life is hitting the fan here.

so to put a start to this, my dad, (who wasn't an asshole in 2015) got cancer, he starred acting bad, then my mom almost got killed in a car crash, then our house gets foreclosed, a family friend dies, my life dies, i got rejected twice, my close friend moves, half of my friends get rezoned to a different school

ok so that covers most of 2015-16

halfway through 2016 my dad becomes an abusive asshole, i end up trying to kill myself for a fifth time (yes i keep track), my dad gets into a car wreck, and im just sitting here wondering why i exist on this shithole, on this shithole planet, in this shithole universe, floating around on measly dust ball going so fast it seems slow.

sorry bout the last part im just pissed sitting here with my blood pumping of rage and thinking about why life matrers and why i shouldn't just shoot myself

drhalsey1
January 15th, 2017, 10:10 PM
alright, so here i am, help me, my life is hitting the fan here.

so to put a start to this, my dad, (who wasn't an asshole in 2015) got cancer, he starred acting bad, then my mom almost got killed in a car crash, then our house gets foreclosed, a family friend dies, my life dies, i got rejected twice, my close friend moves, half of my friends get rezoned to a different school

ok so that covers most of 2015-16

halfway through 2016 my dad becomes an abusive asshole, i end up trying to kill myself for a fifth time (yes i keep track), my dad gets into a car wreck, and im just sitting here wondering why i exist on this shithole, on this shithole planet, in this shithole universe, floating around on measly dust ball going so fast it seems slow.

sorry bout the last part im just pissed sitting here with my blood pumping of rage and thinking about why life matrers and why i shouldn't just shoot myself
Hi. I know things are tough. And I'd gladly talk or listen, whatever you need. Feel free to message me

Pyromaniac27
January 15th, 2017, 10:15 PM
it just feels like my life has slowly been killing me oncthe inside, i feel terrible and i jave no idea what to do or what to thinl, i just dont knoe anymore

swiftshadowolf
January 15th, 2017, 11:20 PM
We all go through bad times, naturally humans magnify the bad things and complain about them like there is no good. The teen years are full of hormonal changes that would make anyone want to scream and shout and die, just remember that millions and billions of other people have been through this, you are not alone, even though it may seem that way to you. No one knows what happens when you pass away, so treasure the one shot you have at life, make the most out of it, even if it is pure shit. As hard as it is, everyday try and think of one good thing and find something to distract yourself such as a hobby, make a friend via social media on VT as an example. Just remember that there is someone on this planet, right now, who is in a situation more than ten times worse than yours, even though it may not seem possible. They would do anything to have your life, so treasure it and live it like you are living it for the less fortunate too. As for your dad, my dad's a ginormous asshole too, I think it's a common trait many dads have. I hope I helped you, even if it was only a millimetre's worth of help, I am truely honored to be of your assistance. Buenos noches y adiós amigo!

Pyromaniac27
January 15th, 2017, 11:22 PM
thanks for the help, i dont know what the wnd says cause ixdont speak Spanish tho :)

drhalsey1
January 15th, 2017, 11:25 PM
The Spanish part meant, good night and goodbye friend

swiftshadowolf
January 15th, 2017, 11:25 PM
Translates to, "goodnight and goodbye friend" although I probably wont be going to sleep for a while. Stupid insomniac brain. Your welcome :3

devnull
February 8th, 2017, 02:53 PM
Almost a month passed since u created this topic so I'm not sure if you're even gonna check it, but I'll write smthn anyways. Or maybe by the time you will be reading this you will already be feeling urself better? :)

lots of people occasionally come to the point when they really start to consider suicide as a real option to solve their problems, especially when there is too much on their plate. but... try to think of it in this way: is your life really so unbearable as you may think it is? do you really want to exchange whatever is left for you in this world and just leave? i think you don't. don't be! I mean, there will be no second chance. just think thoroughly about everything you've been through. you've already made it this far, so why give it away that easy, without even trying to fight?
I'm really sorry about your dad getting cancer, but you might wanna cut him some slack. i don't know how about the others, but if I had cancer, i would spend my days being the worst person the world has ever seen. I think people that have such kind of diseases tend to make the other people suffer as much as possible, so everyone else knows that they're in pain. it is not fair, it is irrational, but that's what people do. i'm not justifying him here, i'm just trying to show you that it is very hard to withstand such burden and also stay nice to the others.

based on my own experience, here are some advices that might help you to feel yourself better. some of them may not be easy to follow, but still...
Even if you're an introvert, try to avoid spending hours sitting on the internet and purposelessly scrolling YouTube. Being alone won't make things better, when people are alone they tend to think more and more about their problems, which eventually only makes the depression worse. Do you have at least someone who you can hang out with in real life? i was really surprised when i noticed how better i felt myself after spending couple hours with someone nice, just walking on the streets and talking about something. being awake all night is also not good habit. I don't know why but things are always seem to be a lot worse for me at night, the night depresses me. And sometimes it helps so much just to take a walk at early morning, just thinking about everything and kinda looking at the things from the different angle. Here comes the hardest part: some physical activity would also be cool. Running, cycling, boxing, swimming, whatever it takes just to keep yourself busy and keep the bad thoughts away.

peace ;)