View Full Version : Very Confused and Need Help

November 20th, 2016, 05:26 PM
Hi! Lately I have been very scared and uneasy about my sexuality. I have always wanted to get married and have kids just like anyone else. I am a 16 year old male. All my life I've had crushes on girls and more recently have wanted to date them. I probably first got into watching pornography at age 13 and it was all straight. But after a while I began watching gay stuff and it turned me on. I find men with muscles very attractive. I am just so confused because lately, I've been worrying I am gay and not straight like I wanted to be. I look at other guys and will ask myself if I think they're attractive and if I can imagine having sex with them and my subconscious always or mostly says yes. At the same time, I'll look at girls and don't get as excited. This is weird because I've never really felt this extreme if thoughts until I began to worry. Also, I could never imagine myself dating another guy. I really feel like I love girls and think they're pretty, but I can't get as easily excited about their bodies. Maybe because I've never seen a real naked girl before? Basically, I think I lust more for men but love women?? I still lust women though. I am really scared and really really want to be straight and get married and have kids, but I'm not sure who I am anymore. Please help me.

PS. I have OCD so I don't know if these thoughts can be attributed to that.:what:

November 20th, 2016, 05:43 PM
I don't think you should worry too much if all you're basing these feelings on is what you see in porn. I would recommend stop watching it for a while, if you're really that worried.
Figuring out your sexuality and feelings for other people takes time...and there is no need to rush anything or be worried about your final destination.

November 20th, 2016, 05:53 PM
I agree. You'll drive yourself crazy if you plan out your future -- especially if you find that your present isn't leading you there. Just take things one day at a time and don't judge yourself.

Just JT
November 20th, 2016, 07:04 PM
Figuring out your sexuality is like one of the most
Complicated things ever for many people. And how your feeling is not weird at all, it's actually very common. Does not mean you into guys girls or not, only that this characteristic of a human body your finding attractive. And so what if you do?

Just relax, at 16 you can still be unsure many times, just be you, follow what interests you and things you like, the rest will walk into place
But yeah maybe a little less porn or something to.

November 21st, 2016, 01:50 AM
I don't think you need to worry at this point. What you described echoes what I have felt and feel sometimes from time to time as well. To begin with though, as has already been suggested, you should stop watching gay porn, as I think that will stop a lot of the conflicting feelings and thoughts. Beyond that, maybe you can try talking to more girls, or befriending them or hanging out with them if the situation is conducive to that. It's tough to say what you should or shouldn't do beyond this though, as sexuality can be confusing and complicated. Good luck.

November 21st, 2016, 01:55 AM
Agree with all the posts here. You don't have to worry so much at the moment. Things will become clearer over time. At the moment your body is awash with hormones which heighten sexual feelings. I would advise not having sex until you feel good and ready - don't fall for peer pressure, just do it when the time feels right with someone you trust whether that person is male or female. You'll know more when the time comes.

November 22nd, 2016, 01:06 PM
The one thing i do know is thinking about your porn preference at 13 won't help. That could've easily been based on peer pressure or whatev expectations u had. Porn in general isn't the best way to figure this out

November 22nd, 2016, 05:38 PM
Don't base your orientation solely off porn. You need to see how you react to both genders in real life. Half of that s**t is fake anyway!

Zachary G
November 29th, 2016, 08:46 AM
What you are feeling is totally normal and something that a lot of us kids experience at some point in our lives. Dont stress about what you may or may not be right now, there will be plenty of time for you to figure it all out. For now, just go with the feelings you have and experience life as it comes to you. Dont force yourself one way or the other, just relax and go with the flow and see where you wind up.

November 29th, 2016, 11:36 AM
Hey you're only 16 you have raging hormones and a lot on your mind I've been there and done the same thing not that there's anything wrong with being gay but it's just more or less of phase. I'd say every guy has watched porn and even go into gay porn because everybody imagine them being the guy get everything done to them. personally I find it really annoying watching girls in porn because they scream and yell so much FAKE and it's annoying as hell I wouldn't be jumping to conclusions about being gay or straight if you know what you feel and what's in your heart you're going to be fine. I wouldn't stress too much over watching a little porn gay straight bi lesbian whatever maybe try laying off the porn and just using your own imagination porn can be a dangerous addiction and [email protected]*k with your mind as in nobody ever is as big as certain guys on porn or sex ever lasting as long as it doesn't porn that's why they have many takes and edits to make the porn long enough LOL

November 30th, 2016, 09:41 PM
This is normal as the hormones r taking
over ur mind and body. I think many of
us r going thru the same thing especially
me. I have the same thoughts that u have
and wonder what will b but the only thing is
to let this all play out and c where it leads to.
Don't keep worrying bout it-it will mess with
ur head.

April 16th, 2017, 09:42 PM
Same same same

April 16th, 2017, 11:22 PM
I know exactly what you mean bro. Don't worry about it, just let yourself go and chill...

April 17th, 2017, 06:15 AM
Same same same

Please don't bump old threads with two or more months inactivity. :locked: