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Phosphene
October 30th, 2016, 09:19 PM
I'm going to start by saying thank you for reading because this is gonna be covering a lot at once and a bit jumbled.

Lately I've just felt so excluded from everything. Like I'm not accepted anywhere. I don't have many friends and it's becoming harder to open up to the ones I have, even to my best friend who's like a sister to me. I find myself wanting to tell her things and not having enough courage which makes no sense as she knows pretty much everything about me. Another friend I'm close to is over a year younger than me and she gets on my nerves more and more as time goes on. Maybe because I'm maturing more, who knows. She's made jibes about my good grades and she knows I hate when people do that, and she jokes around calling people fat and I've gotten really bad about thinking I'm fat and not pretty and such lately. She also makes me feel bad for being so good at music, I really don't like that because I mean that's what I wanna do with my life, should I just hinder myself and go your pace?? I don't fucking think so. There's also a new clique that's giving me hella anxiety. To make matters worse, my ex-boyfriend is part of it. When he broke up with me over a month ago I was so crushed and still am, my self-esteem took a huge blow. I don't even know what else to say about him, we're friends but our relationship is just... I don't even know. My teachers think they know what I'm interested in, how I act, all that jazz, and I feel like I can't be myself, for that reason and also because other kids there think that as well. I don't even feel at ease around most of my family, except my parents and sister whom I live with. The rest of my family treats me differently, takes things away from me and tries to do everything for me because I have a visual impairment. Like wtf, give me a chance. If I saw them more I think things would be different. But with things as is, I get anxiety around them too.

I'm just dealing with so much stress, feeling alone and misunderstood and just plain shit... I really need someone right now.

drhalsey1
October 30th, 2016, 09:26 PM
I'm going to start by saying thank you for reading because this is gonna be covering a lot at once and a bit jumbled.

Lately I've just felt so excluded from everything. Like I'm not accepted anywhere. I don't have many friends and it's becoming harder to open up to the ones I have, even to my best friend who's like a sister to me. I find myself wanting to tell her things and not having enough courage which makes no sense as she knows pretty much everything about me. Another friend I'm close to is over a year younger than me and she gets on my nerves more and more as time goes on. Maybe because I'm maturing more, who knows. She's made jibes about my good grades and she knows I hate when people do that, and she jokes around calling people fat and I've gotten really bad about thinking I'm fat and not pretty and such lately. She also makes me feel bad for being so good at music, I really don't like that because I mean that's what I wanna do with my life, should I just hinder myself and go your pace?? I don't fucking think so. There's also a new clique that's giving me hella anxiety. To make matters worse, my ex-boyfriend is part of it. When he broke up with me over a month ago I was so crushed and still am, my self-esteem took a huge blow. I don't even know what else to say about him, we're friends but our relationship is just... I don't even know. My teachers think they know what I'm interested in, how I act, all that jazz, and I feel like I can't be myself, for that reason and also because other kids there think that as well. I don't even feel at ease around most of my family, except my parents and sister whom I live with. The rest of my family treats me differently, takes things away from me and tries to do everything for me because I have a visual impairment. Like wtf, give me a chance. If I saw them more I think things would be different. But with things as is, I get anxiety around them too.

I'm just dealing with so much stress, feeling alone and misunderstood and just plain shit... I really need someone right now.

If you want I'll gladly talk with you, everyone needs someone there for them, and I'd be glad to talk or listen

Ben7
October 31st, 2016, 01:14 AM
I'm sorry to hear all that. I would be willing to talk with you or listen if you want. I know I'm relatively newer here but if it makes any difference I'm here too if you need anything.

Phosphene
November 1st, 2016, 06:48 AM
This is one of the worst weeks in a long time. It's all I can do to handle this stress, it's like I never get a break. Yesterday I got made fun of by two of the members in the squad (that's what they're calling their clique) for tripping over something I didn't see. I was having a hard time in geometry and then I forgot to bring my book home and it's a crime if I miss an assignment. I can't bring myself to talk to my friends although I know it would make me feel better. I'm promising myself I will try to.

Flapjack
November 1st, 2016, 06:33 PM
This is one of the worst weeks in a long time. It's all I can do to handle this stress, it's like I never get a break. Yesterday I got made fun of by two of the members in the squad (that's what they're calling their clique) for tripping over something I didn't see. I was having a hard time in geometry and then I forgot to bring my book home and it's a crime if I miss an assignment. I can't bring myself to talk to my friends although I know it would make me feel better. I'm promising myself I will try to.
Please do try to buddy!! I am so sorry you're going through all of this buddy but please be strong and remember that things will get better!! I am here for you whenever you need me buddy whether that is to rant or you want advice or whatever I'm here :)

Adarest
November 9th, 2016, 09:42 AM
Talk to somebody about your personal life, you could remain anonymous here as you are, but don't be afraid to ask. I'd love to help, even if I'm restricted from many things. :)