View Full Version : I've destroyed my relationship with my BFF, what should I do?

October 4th, 2016, 09:40 PM
Hello there, I'm new to this forum, and I wanted to talk about my main problem directly. So I'm a freshman just starting in high school, and I've been having problems with my BFF. I'm a guy, and she's a girl, but it feels like we're the same person or have the same personalities. Through our last year of middle school, we really connected, even to the point where I liked her :wub: (that's the least of issues when my BFF stopped talking to me.)

Anyways, my new school has this summer program for freshman just joining, and luckily enough we made it both into the same school. So about the time this started, she started being unresponsive to my texts. :confused: :what: All I knew was, days before, she got in a fight with another one of her best friends, to which there relationship ended there. I really wanted to ask her what was going, but I didn't want to bring it up to her, especially since she was never alone when Nutrition came along. Short moral of the story: don't assume things until you ask. :(

At the same time this was happening, I was dealing with a lot of personal issues in the family, which have slowed down or stopped currently. She didn't respond the three weeks of the summer school, and I felt like she hated me. And I didn't know what to think, or what to do. So all the emotions I've bottled up just poured right out.

I wont go into details, but I called her some things that I really shouldn't have said at all :mad:, because I didn't think it would have consequences. And about last week, my friends from my "summer school" talked to her, asking about her side of the story. She find her as a genuinely nice person (I'm not saying that my BFF isn't nice, she really is, I just got baffled and irritated by the situation). They said that she's heard the things I've called her, and she doesn't care anymore about the situation, and that I made an entire big deal of nothing (which I realized was true). Not to mention, the only reason why she didn't respond was because SHE GOT A NEW PHONE AND DIDN'T TEXT ME THE NEW NUMBER (yeah, now I really feel like the biggest douche).

This has been bothering me ever since, and I really don't know what to do. I just wish I could take back everything I said, because I made such a horrible mistake. Should I give an effort to apologize (even if she doesn't want to hear it from me), or should I just try to find a new friend and just move on? Thanks again for reading this long story. :) P.S. If you have any other advice for my situation, feel free to comment it below.

October 4th, 2016, 09:46 PM
Dude thats horrible. But come on, what is done is done. better repair it before it is too late I feel. Go apologise to her, sincerely tell her everything. Better do it in person if she blocks you on Whatsapp or whatever.

October 7th, 2016, 12:19 PM
You can't undo what you did. I would go to her apologize and tell her you stuck out over anger and frustration. You missed her and talking. Ask her why she didn't text you her new number. That would be an interesting thing to know. Good luck buddy.

October 7th, 2016, 12:24 PM
You just have to get a quiet moment with her, Starting with "I think we need to talk, starting off with a big apology from me". If she doesn't stop and listen initially, there's not a lot you can do. If she does, be sincere, cover the issues you have had, appreciate the fact she has had issues and listen to what she has to say, admit to some of the things you said were wrong. Listen to her, and try and get back what you had.
If you don't speak to here, nothing will happen. The worst that can happen by saying "hi" is nothing
Good luck

Just JT
October 8th, 2016, 07:56 PM
You should always consider what you say very seriously, cause ones you say it, you can't take it back.

That said, you can't undo it. But you can apologize, and let it go, if she cares enough for you, she'll understand in some way why you did what you did and why you behaved that way. If she can't get past it, then you learned something, lost a friend, and proved that relationship wouldn't stand up to the test of time.

Good luck ok?

October 22nd, 2016, 05:00 PM
Life is short, and people make mistskes. It takes a bigger person to admit that they were in the wrong than it does to just not say anything.

Also, you are both going into high school and odds are you are going to make new friends. You may stay friends with her, you may not... people change A LOT in high school, and that's not a bad thing. I'm not saying that all of your friendships are doomed, because that's not true, just something to consider.