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View Full Version : Uncomfortable with my Stepdad


BonBonChika
September 18th, 2016, 08:42 PM
So im a 14 year old african american girl i have 1 older brother we have 2 different dad my brother knows his dad and is close ro gim but my dad left me when i was a baby and my mom got legal custody of me.. when i was around 5 i met the person she was dating which is now "supposibly" my stepdad hes caucasian.. they arent married but have been dating for a long time..when i was little i wasnt really bothered by him..but as i got older i started to distance myself..i dont lwt him.kiss my cheek or let him hug me really i guess its because ive never had a man love me before and i just dont feel comfortable i dont see him as a dad but more of a friend..i guess hes a good person in his own way and i know my mom and him both love eachother but him being around wants me to meet my biological dad.. The only thing i know about my dad is that his name is Howard..and i only seen one pictre of him and its kimd of hard to make out...i feel kind of angry that my older brother has his real dad and not me. Can someone relate or help me with what im feeling? How can i deal with this.

Amethyst Rose
September 18th, 2016, 09:06 PM
Being angry about not knowing your biological dad is understandable; there are people I am close to who don't know one or both biological parents. Has your stepfather given you any reason not to trust him, or are you just reluctant to show affection to him because of your feelings about not knowing your father? You described him as a friend, and it's perfectly fine to hug and be affectionate to a good friend. Maybe someday you will meet your biological father, I hope the best for you!

BonBonChika
September 19th, 2016, 02:27 PM
Being angry about not knowing your biological dad is understandable; there are people I am close to who don't know one or both biological parents. Has your stepfather given you any reason not to trust him, or are you just reluctant to show affection to him because of your feelings about not knowing your father? You described him as a friend, and it's perfectly fine to hug and be affectionate to a good friend. Maybe someday you will meet your biological father, I hope the best for you!

Its not that i dont trust him its just that sometimes his attitude makes me mad xD like he yells at me and i get mad because its not like he gave birth to me

lliam
September 19th, 2016, 04:15 PM
The only thing i know about my dad is that his name is Howard..and i only seen one pictre of him and its kimd of hard to make out...

Then you never had any contact with your dad?

jamie_n5
September 19th, 2016, 07:10 PM
Well you could try find your dad through some search places. Does your mom have any idea at all where he might be? Also I can understand how you feel about your moms boyfriend. I think in his own way that he is only trying to be a parent to you.