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Cadanance00
July 26th, 2016, 05:16 PM
And some days you want to stomp somebody's fucking head in the ground.

All my life I've sought my older brother's approval, and all my life all I've gotten from has been slights and insults. I wish I could never see him again. I wish he would just go the hell away. And stay.

So there
~Caen

Phosphene
July 26th, 2016, 07:23 PM
What good will your older brother's approval do you?
I'm sorry to hear it's bothering you so. I try to get my dad's approval and it feels like I'm never going to live up to what he wants me to be sometimes. But I know he loves me anyway.
There's a difference between wanting someone's approval and needing it.

PlasmaHam
July 26th, 2016, 08:45 PM
I am sorry for your predicament, I honestly understand where you are coming from. As much as you are nice and kind to people, some simply don't care. There are those scumbags in this world who really just love to make people feel awful. You try all you can, but they still see you as something to be mocked.

That is not your fault. Your brother has issues that need to be fixed; learn about kindness and humility. He failed to give you the support and love that a good brother should, you have done no wrong and should not blame yourself for this

If you want to get over this, you must do two things. You must learn to forgive your brother. He may be an awful person, but you need to be a good role-model to him, something he failed to do for you. Returning evil with evil never works, and will just end up with both of you being scumbags. I don't know if you are a Christian or not, but here is a verse for forgiveness towards other.

2 corinthians 2:5-8 NIV
If anyone has caused grief, he has not so much grieved me as he has grieved all of you to some extent—not to put it too severely. The punishment inflicted on him by the majority is sufficient. Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. I urge you, therefore, to reaffirm your love for him.

Luke 23:34
Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.(Note: He is asking God to forgive the people who sentenced and nailed him to the cross he is currently hanging from. Could any of us do that? Forgive the people who have tortured and will kill us?)


The second thing you must do is realize that you don't need the acceptance of others. The world is cruel, its cold and heartless, we must learn not to depend on others for determining our quality of life. In your soul, you must regonise yourself, your greatness, your potential, and that no words can take that away from you. People may try to tear you down, but you must stand strong, for there is always someone supporting you. Early Christians were hated by the population, mocked, ridiculed, tortured, and even killed. But they rarely let that faze them, for this world is only temporary, and that the approval of man was worth nothing.

Galatians 1:10
Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.

Just JT
July 27th, 2016, 04:47 AM
And some days you want to stomp somebody's fucking head in the ground.

All my life I've sought my older brother's approval, and all my life all I've gotten from has been slights and insults. I wish I could never see him again. I wish he would just go the hell away. And stay.

So there
~Caen

Oh my God Caen please don't say that about your brother....I get how you feel and know it can be really hard. But I'm pretty sure he's not all that bad as you feel. He probably is just being hard on younto try and make you a better person, in his eyes. Which is wrong cause you are who you are, and he should accept you for who you are.

Try and not let it bother you, he sees it and he'll be all over it when he can to make you feel that way. Show you can ignore it and be above it and confident in yourself, and he'll see that confidence, and heel begin to stop in time. Laugh with him when he says or does stuff, like you acknowledge he's bustin on you like it's funny, even if he's not. It'll show him your more mature and confident and secure than he thought, and move on.

What good will your older brother's approval do you?
I'm sorry to hear it's bothering you so. I try to get my dad's approval and it feels like I'm never going to live up to what he wants me to be sometimes. But I know he loves me anyway.
There's a difference between wanting someone's approval and needing it.

True, confidence, maturity, being secure in yourself and what you do and say. Even if/when you mess up, lust laugh at it like maybe they do to. They'll know you see it and are ok with making a mistake or something cause we all do.

I am sorry for your predicament, I honestly understand where you are coming from. As much as you are nice and kind to people, some simply don't care. There are those scumbags in this world who really just love to make people feel awful. You try all you can, but they still see you as something to be mocked.

That is not your fault. Your brother has issues that need to be fixed; learn about kindness and humility. He failed to give you the support and love that a good brother should, you have done no wrong and should not blame yourself for this

If you want to get over this, you must do two things. You must learn to forgive your brother. He may be an awful person, but you need to be a good role-model to him, something he failed to do for you. Returning evil with evil never works, and will just end up with both of you being scumbags. I don't know if you are a Christian or not, but here is a verse for forgiveness towards other.

2 corinthians 2:5-8 NIV
If anyone has caused grief, he has not so much grieved me as he has grieved all of you to some extent—not to put it too severely. The punishment inflicted on him by the majority is sufficient. Now instead, you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow. I urge you, therefore, to reaffirm your love for him.

Luke 23:34
Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.(Note: He is asking God to forgive the people who sentenced and nailed him to the cross he is currently hanging from. Could any of us do that? Forgive the people who have tortured and will kill us?)


The second thing you must do is realize that you don't need the acceptance of others. The world is cruel, its cold and heartless, we must learn not to depend on others for determining our quality of life. In your soul, you must regonise yourself, your greatness, your potential, and that no words can take that away from you. People may try to tear you down, but you must stand strong, for there is always someone supporting you. Early Christians were hated by the population, mocked, ridiculed, tortured, and even killed. But they rarely let that faze them, for this world is only temporary, and that the approval of man was worth nothing.

Galatians 1:10
Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.

I've started learning if you believe in your God then your God will almost always help find some support, or help resolving inner conflict. Don't dismiss this.
If your a believer, sir down with a bible set it on the table with the bible on its back. Let it open, to any page it opens to. With a closed eye just start reading. And keep reading until you read upon a passage that will be there that will have some meaning to you and offer some help to you and can be applied to your situation. It works!! No shit!!
It might take some time to find that passage, but it does work, usually within a page or 2. But you need to have faith God will offer his help and understanding and help and guide you on your path


Sorry for so much quoting and babbling, but all said and done, he's your brother. No matter how blended your family is, your still family. And in the end all you'll have is each other. Embrace it the best you can. He does love you, you don't want him to go away, you'll miss him so much. Try talking to him, find a happy middle ground, a way to make it better. Shit, maybe that what he really wants anyways and just don't know hoe to do that. Maybe he's jealous of you and wants to me more like you, and is insecure in himself about that.

So don't sweet it bro, brothers are the best bro....not having one....sucks, really does...

Skylark
July 27th, 2016, 06:12 PM
If all he does is treat you like shit, and I'm sorry for being blunt, fuck him. He's an asshole, so don't try to impress him all the time. He obviously doesn't care about you, so why should you care about him?

jamie_n5
July 29th, 2016, 09:49 PM
I am sorry Kayden. It is tough when siblings don't get along. I am so fortunate that my sister and I are close and get along well. I lost my little brother 13 years ago. I justo t wish I would have had a lifetime to be a great big brother to him. Keep trying to get along with your brother and treat him well even if he treats you like crap. Maybe someday he will finally come around.Good luck.