View Full Version : Gay friend

July 15th, 2016, 12:37 AM
Hello. I am a openly gay male who has a male best friend who I thing is a closet gay. He is known to be straight but shows signs of being gay. I just need some opinions on the matter. First of all he shows little interest in girls but only ever had one girlfriend for one month. Girls throw themselves at him but he always turns them away. We live together and every night we play fight and getting really close. He keeps things to himself especially when the subject of either one of us finding a partner. When I talk about how much I like him his eyes start to tear up. Other people think he's gay but they don't say anything. I know their is no true sign of being gay but I am really curious. I want to be their for him because I know how hard it was for me when I came out and he was their for me. Please help me. I don't want to ask and ruin something or make him coming out harder.

July 15th, 2016, 07:18 AM
You need to give him space and time. If he is gay, he'll disclose or act upon it when he is ready.

July 15th, 2016, 10:46 AM
I agree with Kyle just give him time! He also may not be gay, I am camp as fuck and will happily say another guy is looking sexy etc etc but I am straight:)

The Byrd
July 15th, 2016, 01:51 PM
I disagree with what has been said above. For some people it's not as easy as just waiting it out and some people need to be asked directly so that they can just say yes or no. From what I can tell you're both close so I can't imagine just asking the question would cause any friction between you two. The pros of it are that you can know and it could lift the weight off his shoulders of having it all built up inside of him. Also it could bring you closer together. The only con that I can think of is that it may make him angry for a short while but if it does just explain this to him.

Zachary G
July 15th, 2016, 04:17 PM
You need to give him space and time. If he is gay, he'll disclose or act upon it when he is ready.

Yeah, give him space and give him time, keep being the good friend you are and maybe, one day, he will feel comfortable enough to talk to you about it, but whatever you do, dont force the issue. Just keep things as they are and let him move at his own pace.

July 15th, 2016, 05:36 PM
Just continue to b there for him since
he was there for u and tell him so. Tell
him that if there is anything he wants to
talk about that u will listen-since he wells
up when u talk about partners I would say
that he does like u more than a friend but
it is difficult for him to let loose-I would say
like others above that u should give him time
but don't pressure him.

July 15th, 2016, 07:28 PM
Just because a guy doesn't want to go out with every girl that likes him doesn't mean he is gay. From your post, I see nothing that really supports him being gay. I love wrestling and fighting, rarely date, and really don't like to talk about relationships, yet I am straight as can be.

Just JT
July 16th, 2016, 12:06 PM
You could kinda bring up the topic like in a third party way. Say you know a guy who you think is gay and struggling to come out or something. Tell him you wana ask him but I sure how he'd feel, see what he says. Might give you an indication one way or the other how he's feel or respond

July 17th, 2016, 08:28 PM
It looks like from what you describe that he is struggling emotionally about what to do. He most likely loves you very much but is struggling to figure out his true sexuality. I don't know if pushing him or leaving him alone or which would be the right thing. You know him the best and should be able to kind of read him and feel him out. I hope things work out for you man.