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Matryoshkasystem
May 29th, 2016, 04:22 PM
I feel broken inside,like a bunch of fragments. I also am extremely desensitized to...everything emotions,physical stimuli, etc. I also can't remember much of my childhood, and parts that I do are far and few between-which all eventually vanish once again-. I have some alter egos-i guess you can call them that-, which hold stuff like emotions, desires, urges, likes, dislikes, pretty everything I'm more or less an empty shell and the alter egos hold the stuff supposed to be inside of me. My mom says this is normal, I doubt her, but is it? Is this possibly due to what I posted in abuse-remembered more but...embarrassed to post it-?

Just JT
May 30th, 2016, 10:22 AM
Sounds like as painful as it seems for you, you also feel a need to talk about it
Talking does help, the pain is short term, and hurts like all shit
But you'll feel better after

Matryoshkasystem
May 30th, 2016, 11:29 AM
TJreversed Thanks, its just that its now gotten to the point, I honestly don't feel anything unless the one that holds it comes forward. That and they each have their own memories, and personalities sesperate from me, more like their just pretending to be me. Just the only reason I asked if it could be tied to the abuse I've told you all about, since this kind of stuff sometimes happens due to that.

Just JT
May 30th, 2016, 11:35 AM
I'm not sure what you mean here, the one that holds it? And tied to past abuse?
Can I ask what yiur talking about here?
Just having a hard time grasping everything, sorry

Matryoshkasystem
May 30th, 2016, 11:52 AM
TJreversed Look at the Is this Normal? Under the abuse article. The one that holds it is more like I'm only happy when the one that's constantly happy is out, I like soccer when it comes out, etc. Also by past abuse I mean emotional/mental no physical.

Just JT
May 30th, 2016, 12:00 PM
I read that post. And seems to me that the way you fee is probably related to how you were treated. And I'll tell you, that most things that are broken can be repaired to.
It's not an easy thing, many hard choices, but you can do it.

It's a matter of what are you going to do about it for you and your sister

Matryoshkasystem
May 30th, 2016, 12:18 PM
TJreversed thanks, though my sister doesn't deal with as many problems at home, due to the fact she fits into the family. I stick out in my entire family, sensitive-not in a bad way-, cheerful-or at least was-,ambi/extroverted, just overall different from the majority,if not all, of my family.