View Full Version : Working myself up into depression

May 7th, 2016, 03:14 AM
So I broke up with my girlfriend 4 and a bit months ago after a long term relationship. I was super happy for about 1 - 2 months. Then, I started wanting a girlfriend again. I can't though as I am going overseas for 6 months come August to study overseas, so any relationship is pointless.
I go to uni and work throughout the week. Over the last 4 months though, I feel the pressure of life taking its toll on me, university, my job, going overseas, the pressure I put on myself to do my best, my ex ec. and have spoken to my parents about depression before. I thought I was over my ex, which I still think I am but I found out a couple of days ago she has another boyfriend. I found out before I left work to drive home, I thought I was handling it well, but by the time I got home I was balling my eyes out. I was upset. I did not know what it was though. I wasn't specifically upset about anything, but I was just so insanely upset. I think finding out about my ex was the tipping point.

For the last 5 days of so I have been severely depressed and have loss all motivation, drive, feeling, etc.

Over the last 4 months I have spoken to my friends about my impeding sadness and overwhelmness which they have all listened and its helped me express myself, but I dont really care anymore. I feel nothing is helping.

I generally can think of things in the future to look forward too and it will cheer me up. All the things I can think of don't do anything for me.

I literally dont know whats wrong with me.

I feel like I am being 'weak' or 'a little baby.' I am hoping that going overseas will change everything, but its in 3 months and I am just not coping.

May 7th, 2016, 08:46 AM
First off, bashing yourself does the exact opposite of helping you. (Although I have never been through a breakup, or in a relationship for that matter) I know it's completely normal to feel sad after a break up, whether it was one-sided or mutual. (Forgive me if what I say next sounds harsh) Now if you really want to get into another relationship any time soon (which based off of your hectic schedule I highly don't recommend) being a sad sack won't help you will it ;)? Right now, I would recommend focusing on your school work and job, so that in the future you'll have at least a financially secure job, and finding a GF will be your main issue (rather than deciding how to pay your bills). A girlfriend may seem like the best thing in the world, don't get me wrong it can be, but based off of your situation now, it really wouldn't be the best for you right now. Try to get through this break-up because if you ever want to be truly happy in a relationship, you need to learn to love yourself (while a generic saying, it does ring true).
Best of Luck :)

May 13th, 2016, 03:49 AM
Break-ups are difficult and the pain of them is like nothing I've ever experienced in my life. If you have depressive tendencies then it's no wonder a break up has pushed you into one.

I think, if like you say, it's been 5 years you need to realise you might need to see a professional about this. Talking to friends is great but you might need professional support too. I know it's scary to ask for that for so many reasons, and when you don't have hope for the future it's hard to have hope for anything helping, but you just have to ask yourself, can you carry on like this? And if you can't you need help.

When it comes to break ups I just try and think that you will feel what you felt for someone else. It might be years away, but you might. And this might work out and make you happy in the end.