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Gumleaf
February 19th, 2016, 04:26 AM
I don't know whether it's the stress of the week with lots of things on and some disappointments, but I'm having a bad attack of negativity and very depressive thoughts today. I don't even know what's set me off, but all I know that feels true right now in my head is that I'm pathetic and that my life is a total sham, has no point and I could quietly die and nobody would notice or give a rats. I led my church small group in a study the other night which went no where near as good as I would have hoped and everyone is probably laughing behind my back at my incompetence. I've been on dates with a nice girl and it seems that she's had enough of me too. I mean, I don't blame her. Why would you want to be involved with a nutter like me? I have the looks of a brick wall and a personality to match. I've done so well this year so far, but all the negativity has hit and hit me really hard. Ironically enough the small group study was about responding to negative attacks. But I guess because I did so terrible at that, I can't take my own advice. I was born as a mistake and have been a mistake ever since!

Chapperz16
February 19th, 2016, 04:32 AM
Don't ever call yourself a mistake, you are who you make yourself to be. Many people have trouble on the dating scene me included but its how you overcome that and use it to build up. I'm terms of your Church study group, open up to them. Only by expressing yourself can you hope to feel better. I hope this helps though I've written it ony phone so not that long.

Gumleaf
February 20th, 2016, 06:44 AM
Don't ever call yourself a mistake, you are who you make yourself to be. Many people have trouble on the dating scene me included but its how you overcome that and use it to build up. I'm terms of your Church study group, open up to them. Only by expressing yourself can you hope to feel better. I hope this helps though I've written it ony phone so not that long.

Thanks. Idk, it just feels like I'm all alone and nobody gets it most of the time.

Living For Love
February 23rd, 2016, 07:15 AM
I understand what you're going through right now, Stephen. Sometimes problems just seem to pile up and we become simply overwhelmed with them, with absolutely no solutions or any other signs that things are going to get better. Remember that your bible study group is a service for God, and I'm sure he's always pleased whenever you teach his word or help other people understand it. Don't let yourself down because of it. I've also been noticing you give way too much importance (in my opinion) to girls and relationships. This might sound a bit selfish and rude, but I think there's more to life than having a girlfriend or at least someone we truly love in that sense. When I was younger, I also yearned for someone I imagined myself spending the rest of my life with. I eventually came to the conclusion that I am personally not suited or capable of doing that, of spending my entire life with somebody else, for various reasons. I understand you probably dream of building a family, having a stable job, kids, a nice house with a nice garden, a nice car, etc. but don't forget it is not impossible doing that without a girlfriend or spouse. I'm not trying to discourage you or anything, I'm just trying to say that you shouldn't let yourself get so affected whenever things don't go right in your romantic life. You're still young and who knows what can happen in the future. Maybe you'll find someone who truly likes you for you, maybe it will take more time than you expect, but whatever happens, you can still be happy in your own way. :)

Gumleaf
February 24th, 2016, 06:01 PM
I understand what you're going through right now, Stephen. Sometimes problems just seem to pile up and we become simply overwhelmed with them, with absolutely no solutions or any other signs that things are going to get better. Remember that your bible study group is a service for God, and I'm sure he's always pleased whenever you teach his word or help other people understand it. Don't let yourself down because of it. I've also been noticing you give way too much importance (in my opinion) to girls and relationships. This might sound a bit selfish and rude, but I think there's more to life than having a girlfriend or at least someone we truly love in that sense. When I was younger, I also yearned for someone I imagined myself spending the rest of my life with. I eventually came to the conclusion that I am personally not suited or capable of doing that, of spending my entire life with somebody else, for various reasons. I understand you probably dream of building a family, having a stable job, kids, a nice house with a nice garden, a nice car, etc. but don't forget it is not impossible doing that without a girlfriend or spouse. I'm not trying to discourage you or anything, I'm just trying to say that you shouldn't let yourself get so affected whenever things don't go right in your romantic life. You're still young and who knows what can happen in the future. Maybe you'll find someone who truly likes you for you, maybe it will take more time than you expect, but whatever happens, you can still be happy in your own way. :)

Thanks for the encouragement. I've pretty much snapped out of the episode that prompted the original post. I do find it a bit difficult and discouraging when pretty much every week another friend or person I know has entered a new relationship. The thing for me that doesn't help me being content being single is that I don't have a lot of friends and not much of a social life. I think if things were better in that aspect of life, I would be okay. I mean, if you're surrounded by loving people, then I wouldn't likely crave a relationship like I do if that makes sense? I went back to small group last night. Only two of the people who were there for my study turned up and it wasn't mentioned, but I can't get it out of my head that they are probably all laughing at me behind my back. Anyways, just got to deal with that. Thanks again dude.