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View Full Version : Does fetal incontinence provoke judgement?


Zensitivity
January 5th, 2016, 05:21 AM
Let's begin with a scenario:

You're in school, and your male classmate asks to go to the bathroom. He returns roughly 20 minutes later. This repeats sometimes multiple times a day, frequently throughout the year. You've definitely noticed it. He returns perfectly clean and does not carry an odor.

What's going through your head? Do you think something potentially disgusting is occurring? This is completely and ridiculously abnormal, right?

So you talk to this friend, and he reveals that his bowels are not perfectly normal and he struggles when making bowel movements.
Do any of these occur in your mind?
"That's so disgusting."
"I didn't need to hear that."
"He's 17 and still doesn't know how to poop."

Do you judge him before given an explanation?
Do you judge him after he explains the situation?
Do you pity him? If so, will you ever be able to see him the same way again?
Can you, and will you, use this as leverage if needed?
Will you find him disgusting and weird?

Uniquemind
January 5th, 2016, 05:33 AM
None of those things.

If I was in that scenario, I asked question therefore I am to endure any kind of response.

A negative reaction is due to the questioner not being ready, they have no right to judge especially after having their question honored by a respectful response.

MartyG
January 5th, 2016, 11:57 AM
Fetal incontinence?

Maybe you mean "Fecal Incontinence" ?

northy
January 5th, 2016, 04:32 PM
It's not his fault, he's likely ill. Leave him be and don't embarrass him by asking.

Microcosm
January 5th, 2016, 05:12 PM
It's a nasty thought, but it's not his fault. Plus, I agree with Uniquemind's logic.

Zensitivity
January 5th, 2016, 07:28 PM
Fetal incontinence?

Maybe you mean "Fecal Incontinence" ?

Yes, sorry. I was trying to post this quickly before school.

Thank you all for your feedback, I've always been self conscious and I've been worried about what this caused people to think.

miahere
January 18th, 2017, 04:33 AM
Let's begin with a scenario:

You're in school, and your male classmate asks to go to the bathroom. He returns roughly 20 minutes later. This repeats sometimes multiple times a day, frequently throughout the year. You've definitely noticed it. He returns perfectly clean and does not carry an odor.

What's going through your head? Do you think something potentially disgusting is occurring? This is completely and ridiculously abnormal, right?

So you talk to this friend, and he reveals that his bowels are not perfectly normal and he struggles when making bowel movements.
Do any of these occur in your mind?
"That's so disgusting."
"I didn't need to hear that."
"He's 17 and still doesn't know how to poop."

Do you judge him before given an explanation?
Do you judge him after he explains the situation?
Do you pity him? If so, will you ever be able to see him the same way again?
Can you, and will you, use this as leverage if needed?
Will you find him disgusting and weird?

I'm glad I found this post, I feel less alone with this condition,
I've been bladder and bowel incontinent four nearly my whole life and I deal with this with diapers. Unfortunately I have to wear 24/7 cause I can have 3-4 bowel accidents a day with more urinary accidents >.<
During the night I have two bowel accidents and don't wake up for it which makes mornings terrible >.< the clean up takes time.
I wear pretty thick diapers because my accidents are frequent but it also traps the odor for some time, anyway I change as soon as possible if I have a bowel accident.

This post is a little too old but I say you should definitely not judge until you know anything about the situation, and just help him through it, pity isn't really a mental booster.