PDA

View Full Version : How old is old enough to talk about marriage?


WalkingOnDisaster
February 20th, 2013, 09:05 AM
Hey. Excuse my story if you wish and continue with answering the question.
My boyfriend and I have made it to three years in August of this year, and we both have been talking very seriously about marriage. He's 17 and I'm not even 16 yet, though. Both sets of parents (his and mine) say it's a good idea, and that they love the fact that we're taking our relationship so seriously.
We talk about whether or not we want kids, where we wanna live, what we want our wedding to be like, what we wanna do for jobs and that kind of thing. We're both very serious about each other, and really try our hardest to be good to each other. Of which we both do pretty good.
But some people tell us we're jumping the gun. They say how I'm still so young and how he could be just taking advantage of me and blah blah blah. We don't have sex, and we don't sleep together. But we are serious about each other.
So, what do you think? Are we too young?

Atonement
February 20th, 2013, 09:39 AM
In my opinion, I would call that very young. I'm not saying you're too young, but very young. I don't say so because you are young, but rather because I doubt you've experienced enough life to know what you want to do. I'm also not saying you don't know what you want, but locking yourself into the institution of marriage at such an age may block you from other opportunities that you could benefit from. Before seriously considering marriage, go out and do more. I don't know your situation nor plans, but experience a wider variety of life before settling down, because that's essentially what marriage is for most people.

AbbaZabba
February 20th, 2013, 09:40 AM
I'm probably not the best answer here at 15, but I'll tell you what I think at this point in my life. First, it's kind of up to each couple, but I'd like to wait till I'm at least 21 to even mention the word and would prefer waiting till I'm at least 25 to get married. I don't want the responsibility and I want to do what I want before I do get married. Who knows, I could be married much earlier, but that's what I want right now and I'm usually good with stuff like that.

Jess
February 20th, 2013, 09:49 AM
I think that's a bit too early....I'd say age 21 is a better age to talk about marriage.......but that's just me

wayne
February 20th, 2013, 10:59 AM
Hey.

I think it's early to discuss about Marriage.It's good that you and your bf are in a very serious relationship,but try to figure out other important stuff as well.Like,career etc.

dvd333
February 21st, 2013, 12:54 PM
My gf and i have talked about that too... just dont do it too early. You could change you mind or even change as people.

anyone50
February 21st, 2013, 06:49 PM
It depends on your cultural background and maturity level more than anything there is no so called "Right Age". Common sense as well as laws tells us that girls in Western Society can't get married until a specified age but i'm sure it's talked about at almost any age from the time boys and girls discover each other.

With that being said i see no reason why the two of you can't talk about marriage but talking and doing is 2 different things. I guess in some states with parental consent you could get married in most states at 16 but would you want to. You say you have been together for a period of time and respect each other so my question is what's the rush?

Wouldn't it be soo much easier once your both out of school and at least one of you has a full time job? If you both love each other now would you not love each other in 3 yrs. Just curious what the urgency is about?

unnamed94
February 22nd, 2013, 12:45 AM
you are way too young. theres a lot to experience and learn before you start thinking about getting married. even if your parents agree its a good idea i think you are WAY too young and he is too. i know some friends of mine talk about that with their gfs or bfs (they are 18-20) but its not a serious talk at all and the talks on that fade after a week or so.

please dont use that horrible font color its hard to read what you wrote

SammieRose
February 22nd, 2013, 09:27 AM
You are definitely not TOO young to start planning for your future, he's a year away from being "tried as an adult" :P and you 2.

Planning, dreaming, is all good, starting the wedding planning right now will be jumping the gun, but I do not see that on your story, just two people who love each other, dreaming of their future together.

Just disregard those people who are most likely jealous of you two as they probably lack the will to plan for the future or are resentful because they were clueless at your age.

Dream, plan, love each other.

WalkingOnDisaster
February 22nd, 2013, 12:41 PM
You are definitely not TOO young to start planning for your future, he's a year away from being "tried as an adult" :P and you 2.

Planning, dreaming, is all good, starting the wedding planning right now will be jumping the gun, but I do not see that on your story, just two people who love each other, dreaming of their future together.

Just disregard those people who are most likely jealous of you two as they probably lack the will to plan for the future or are resentful because they were clueless at your age.

Dream, plan, love each other.

Sammie, your post made me happy. Thank you very, very much. :)

workingatperfect
February 22nd, 2013, 02:05 PM
I think it's too young to start seriously thinking about it, but as sammie said, there's nothing wrong with thinking and dreaming about it and letting each other know that you want to. However, I do think you should be out of high school for a couple years before you actually commit to the idea and start putting money into it. You may also want to be living together a little while prior to getting married. I've seen a lot of friendships and relationships go south because they couldn't handle living together. But in general, what's the rush? You're still going to love each other in a few years, except you'll both be adults and be even more sure of your relationship, and probably even have more money for the wedding, which are very expensive.