Please help! I dont know what to say to her!

[Echelon]

Hi,
theres this girl at school who "likes" me, and I "like" her. She would go out with me, but we dont know each other well enough. My problem is that I dont know what to say to her. Shes not hard to talk to, and when I do get talking to her im fine, its just I dont know what to say! So I end up standing there with her not saying anything and it upsets her, which in turn upsets me.

I know how stupid this sounds, but its getting me really down. I feel awfull. We're becoming more distant because of it. I REALLY dont want to lose her. I just dont know what i would do. Its so stupid! theres no reason for it i just dont know what to say!

[Gumleaf]

just try and forget about "liking her" and think of her as one of your friends, besides, relationships usually develop through friendships first anyway.

[Echelon]

Thanks, but I do treat her like a close friend. Its just that I dont know WHAT to talk about. Its lack of confidense I think. Anyone have any advice? this is really getting me down.

[free2bme]

i have a relationship like that i say stay friends for longer or u will probably end up regreting it

[Echelon]

this is really getting to me now. I hate myself for it. Im just not confident with my self. For the first time in my life ive been cutting myself over something.

[Maverick]

Stop cutting. It won't solve anything. You're only going to make things worst.

Just take a deep breath. Start off my simply asking how her day was or ask her what kind of things she likes to do. Sometimes if you're unsure of what to say you keep the conversation centered around her so she does most of the talking. Like ask questions. It's a good way to keep the conversation flowing.

[Amphetamine]

Stop cutting. It won't solve anything. You're only going to make things worst.

Just take a deep breath. Start off my simply asking how her day was or ask her what kind of things she likes to do. Sometimes if you're unsure of what to say you keep the conversation centered around her so she does most of the talking. Like ask questions. It's a good way to keep the conversation flowing.

I agree, fully.

At first though, I suggest keeping things short and sweet, not just a full game of twenty questions. I guess it all depends on how well you two know each other, though.

Good luck. :)

[Echelon]

I thought i was getting over this. Then today I completly lost my confidence. One minute i was talking to her fine then the next im like a frickin mute. I hate myself for this. If i lose her i dont know what im gonna do. Ive looked up the symptons. I am depressed it would seem. Im a complete joke. Im worthless...

[Amphetamine]

do not say you are worthless. no one is worthless.
you should not be downing yourself because you froze up while talking to her. you apparently like her a lot which is why you are freezing up. maybe you should set the feelings aside for a day or so and see if it is any easier to talk to her and if it is not, i suggest just writing a note.
i am sure it is not likely of you losing her. do not think like that. it just puts on an added risk.

[Echelon]

I really cant beleive how stupid ive been. Ive stopped cutting myself (not that I was doing that much harm to myself. Theres only faint red marks visible now, and I only notice them because I already know they're there.

I have sat down and spoke with her about it all. We both ended up crying about something or other, but we were honest with each other, and everything seems to be going ok now. Its all of a sudden much easier to hold a conversation, and im not feeling like i was now.

[Amphetamine]

well that is a good thing that you guys talked it out and were honest. honesty is the key, ya know? :P
i am glad you are not feeling like you were, though.

[Echelon]

Well ive got over the feeling like crap part, but i still dont know what to talk about. My mind just goes blank. Im really annoyed about this, and she said its frustrating.

And thanks for the support!

[Amphetamine]

wait, she said it was frustrating that you could not find anything to talk about or because neither of you know what to say?
just start out by asking how she is, how her day has been, and usually you can carry on a conversation from there.

not a problem :)

[northskater110]

Yay good for you! If you ever need a conversation starter, talk about a sports team, the clothes she wears, tell her eyes/hair look good. Just keep going!
Hope this helps

[Echelon]

Well im seeing her again tommrow out of school. I can think of hundreds of things to say untill im actualy with her. Then my mind goes blank. Guess its just my confidence. Hopefully i can get around this, because i really beleive that this could lead to something even if i am only 15. We just seem so perfect for each other. I stilll remember the first time i saw her. I didnt beleive in love at first site, but we were standing there talking to friends and our eyes met. She came over to me and we started talking. It was like ive known her all my life! We are so similar its scary! We like ALL the same things, dress in the same style, ect. I cant decribe it!

[Amphetamine]

aww. that sounds so sweet! :)
when you see her outside of school tomorrow, start out by just asking her how her weekend has been? be the one to start the conversation. in most cases, if a guy starts the conversation, the girl ends up starting one herself. i guess in a way it is like a win win. good luck tomorrow. :)

[Echelon]

Thanks :) cant wait! Not even been 48 hours yet, and it feels like a week!

[Echelon]

This cant be happening again! It cant be! She has just told me that shes moving away to Manchester, after sixth form! I feel absolutely awful. I want to die. Why does this always happen to me? Why?